Ah…Sorry To Bother You Mr. Obama, Sir **Original Author**

Posted on August 2, 2008 by Uppity Woman

Copyright © 2008 Uppity Woman. All Rights Reserved.


Excuse me Mr. Obama, I mean Senator Obama, sir. Um……I know you are busy and important and stuff. I mean running for president is very important and….

…..ah………I hate to bother you. I will only take a minute ok, sir?

See, I have these missing pieces that are holding me up, and I was wondering sir, if you could take time out of your busy schedule and help me out. You know, no big deal, just some loose ends and things.

Hey, you have a nice place here! The wife sees houses like this on TV all the time and says boy she wishes she had digs like this you know? is that painting real? Really??? Wow. I saw something like that in a museum once!

Oh, sorry sir. I didn’t mean to get off the track. So if you could just help me out a minute and give me some details, I will get right out of your way. I want to close this case and maybe take the wife to Coney Island or something. Ever been to Coney Island? No, I didn’t think so…….

Well, listen, anyways, I can’t seem to get some information I need to wrap this up. These things seem to either be “locked” or “not available’. I’m sure it’s just some oversight or glitch or something, so if you could you tell me where these things are….. I….I…. have them written down here somewhere….oh wait. Sorry about the smears. It was raining out. I’ll just read it to you.

Could you help me please find these things, sir?

Your Occidental College records
Your Columbia College records
Your Columbia Thesis paper
Your Harvard College records
Your Selective Service Registration
Your medical records
Your Illinois State Senate records
Your Illinois State Senate schedule
Your Law practice client list
A Certified Copy of your original Birth certificate
Your embossed, signed paper Certification of Live Birth 
Your Harvard Law Review articles that were published
Your University of Chicago scholarly articles
Your Record of baptism

Oh hey…listen! I know you are busy! Is this too much for you now? I mean tell you what. I will come back tomorrow. Give you some time to get these things together, you know? I mean, I know you are busy, so I will just let my self out. I will be back tomrorrow. And the day after……

*********Note: This post went viral as an email, lifted by a plagiarizing thief. I suppose I should consider myself lucky that he/she didn’t steal my Teee Vee!

As you can see, this piece was published on August 2, 2008. It was also published at No Quarter on August 3, 2008, with permission.

http://www.noquarterusa.net/blog/2008/08/03/ahsorry-to-bother-you-mr-obamasir/

This post is plastered all over the net without credits. For some strange reason there are actually people out there who want to know if it is “true”. I am not sure that “true” means here since it is clearly a satire in the Columbo vein. Columbo is not a real person. In any event, I am the original author, and this was a satire addressing all the conspiracies that traversed the net during 2008.

The caricature is what I believe to be Fair Use.

Apparently, for writers, the new “Most Sincere Form Of Flattery” is Plagiarism.

And that is that.

Filed under: Uncategorized

« Y Los Latinos???? Here’s How Bad The Clintons Were to African Americans »

55 Responses

  1. scott in jupiter, on August 2nd, 2008 at 2:33 PM Said:

    With how hard the blogs and the MSM pressed for Clintons First Lady papers and the Library donor list, why no questions about allllllll this?

  2. diamondtiger, on August 2nd, 2008 at 3:08 PM Said:

    Holy Bejesus Batman! I knew there was stuff missing, but all of IT?????

    Thank You!

    have a site for you (for laughs)……but knowing you, you’ve been there…..

    http://bestobamafacts.com/

  3. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 3:25 PM Said:

    Yeah that’s a great site. I’ve been thinking of featuring it.

  4. Lady Boomer NYC, on August 2nd, 2008 at 3:27 PM Said:

    Who better to investigate Obama than my fave character, Lt. Colombo! If only all these mysteries, roadblocks, and deflections could be solved in a 2-hour special. We’d avert our country going down the wrong path, again, for umpty-ump more years. How can lack of transparency be New Politics? Same ol’, same ol’.

  5. Patti, on August 2nd, 2008 at 3:33 PM Said:

    I can’t stand it. I feel like a miserable f*k and I come here to just to see if I still have a sense of humor left.

    You never fail me. I feel validated. I hate to kiss ass but I gotta tell you, I’d be so lonesome without your wit and intelligence. I have been waiting sooo long for a Columbo moment and now I can go back to taking care of my home and get some other things done so I can get back to my PUMA friends and the issues that need to be depun’k.

    I’m laughing again and I feel encouraged.

    Nice. These are the issues at hand among many others, of course.

  6. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 3:38 PM Said:

    That’s my job and I am glad if I am doing it well. Spread the word. Tell your friends to come see Uppity. That’s my job. It has always been my job. I take my job very seriously in a funny kind of way. …….

    Trust me, your work needs no further validation. But just consider me that Chevas on the rocks at the end of the day, or at the beginning if it’s going to be really rough. :)

    God, I just used an emoticon. Someone kill me. Do it now.

  7. Laurie, on August 2nd, 2008 at 4:01 PM Said:

    ALL of that stuff??? WOW!!!

    BTW have you checked out BO’s exam paper he set in 2003 for his Constitutional Law students.

    http://graphics8.nytimes.com/packages/pdf/politics/2008OBAMA_LAW/conlaw3.obama.2003.fall.pdf

  8. Mary, on August 2nd, 2008 at 4:17 PM Said:

    Only two kinds of people hide things:
    Those with guily secrets;
    Those who want to intimidate others through fear.

    BoBo is a 2-fer!

  9. Patti, on August 2nd, 2008 at 4:19 PM Said:

    You are in deed. Insofar as emoticons, I stray away but I saw one this morning on ‘ your not my sweetie ‘ and I can’t copy and paste it. Its a must have.

    I have gotten into a habit over the years of examining my conscience as the last thing I do at night. Now it’s the second to the last thing I do.

  10. Mary, on August 2nd, 2008 at 4:29 PM Said:

    Grt rid of the Manchurian Candidate. Sign the Petition to Impeach Sen. Obama.

    http://www.ipetitions.com/donations/index.html?id=87b0beba

  11. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 4:47 PM Said:

    Gigglechick designed “I am not your sweetie” buttons. I had one in a post a month or so ago. Very cool.

  12. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 4:50 PM Said:

    Here’s her blog. I think she has a boatload of stuff at cafe press. Tell her Uppity sent you.
    http://www.gigglechick.com/erin/blog/index.htm

  13. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 5:45 PM Said:

    Yeah Laurie I saw that and what struck me were his notes. They reflect his narcissim. He enjoyed interjecting himself into his questions. In one he speaks of Mr. Obama, a handsome man, I might add. Very strangely and HEAVILY narcissist.

  14. Patti, on August 2nd, 2008 at 6:23 PM Said:

    Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)

    Mommy’s Losing It, Week 8: Getting moving…and not the way you think
    Filed under: Uncategorized

    I went here to peek and it is appears to be a really light spot for anyone expecting. I will have to look at it again. Having four lovely daughters, gigglechick and this one may bring us closer. Its all good.

    I am never going to get anything done today.

  15. Patti, on August 2nd, 2008 at 6:25 PM Said:

    I love my new little Baby Puma.

  16. Patti, on August 2nd, 2008 at 6:28 PM Said:

    he is just incredible and out of this world

    a fucking menace

  17. HT, on August 2nd, 2008 at 6:32 PM Said:

    Uppity, just had to delurk once again to tell you to STOP IT! my sides are splitting, yet on the sad side, you are so on the mark. Keep on doing what you do. I’ll be here, every day, as usual.

  18. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 6:50 PM Said:

    Hey that’s my job. It’s what I do. I take my job very seriously in a funny kind of way….

  19. Mary, on August 2nd, 2008 at 7:22 PM Said:

    SPREAD THE WORD: NOBAMA ’s NEED A LAWYER!

    Sorry, Inspector Columbo. Here’s the score card, found at TD’s site today. If someone hires a lawyer to force cour disclosure of the COLB, SSS Registration, health records, etc, there are enough NObama’s to chip in to cover the fee. Better yet, maybe someone knows a lawyer who loves his country enough to waive his fee.

    texasdarlin // August 2, 2008 at 12:54 am
    Thanks to Elliewyatt for this list:
    Occidental College records – Not released
    Columbia College records – Not released
    Columbia Thesis paper – “not available”
    Harvard College records – Not released
    Selective Service Registration – Not released
    Medical records – Not released
    Illinois State Senate records – “not available”
    Illinois State Senate schedule – “not available”
    Law practice client list – Not released
    Certified Copy of original Birth certificate – Not released
    Embossed, signed paper Certification of Live Birth – Not released

    Harvard Law Review articles published – None
    University of Chicago scholarly articles – None

  20. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 7:34 PM Said:

    Yup mary, Tex and I hang out in the same circles so to speak. I think the list actually originally came from that swift boat guy’s book.

  21. NoEmptySuits, on August 2nd, 2008 at 8:25 PM Said:

    Uppity, we have a lot to hold Harvard responsible for, but admitting Barky to Harvard College is not one of them. (I believe he started at Occidental and then transferred to Columbia (College) — by all accounts he was shy and reclusive at the latter (his pre-Holy Ghost days).

  22. Uppity Woman, on August 2nd, 2008 at 8:30 PM Said:

    NES, that’s because he hadn’t met up with Rezko yet.

  23. Evening Open Thread + An Expose’ on Our Writers : NO QUARTER, on August 2nd, 2008 at 8:30 PM Said:

    [...] of course, there’s Uppity Woman. This is how she adorns her blog: Kittens For [...]

  24. gigglechick, on August 2nd, 2008 at 10:25 PM Said:

    thanks for posting my blog Uppity! here’s the direct cafepress link (you rock!)

    http://www.cafepress.com/gigglechick

  25. fif, on August 2nd, 2008 at 10:26 PM Said:

    Yea, and isn’t this the candidate who promised: “I will have the most transparent administration in history!”

    Liar, liar pants on fire.

  26. HypeJersey, on August 2nd, 2008 at 10:48 PM Said:

    Proof of Birth? Proof of Baptism?

    What the hell is wrong with you asking those things?

    Proof of baptism can be found in the gospel of john.

    Proof of birth? I suggest you track down those 3 wise men. They’ll vouch.

  27. jmk, on August 3rd, 2008 at 1:24 AM Said:

    Glad that hypejersey straightened us out on those 2 items. As for the rest, good work, Columbo!

    As for you uppity, you’re most brilliant post ever – and that takes a lot.

    For lightening up further in these dark days, just saw the perfect PUMA movie- Mamma Mia! Meryl Streep outshines even herself, the production exceeds all expectations – and this coming from one who saw the original stage production in SF.

    We PUMA’s need uppity and Meryl’s Mamma Mia to keep up our spirits- and our sense of humor.

  28. Uppity Woman, on August 3rd, 2008 at 1:33 AM Said:

    Do you smell incense and myrh when he’s near? Because that’s the tipoff.

  29. Organic, on August 3rd, 2008 at 1:43 AM Said:

    That was AWESOME!

  30. airliebird58, on August 3rd, 2008 at 8:51 AM Said:

    Really enjoyed the article, thanks for posting :)

  31. Star, on August 3rd, 2008 at 11:41 AM Said:

    Today in the Times there was a story that said his friends were upset that there was so lilttle food in his fridge when he was a kid–was this when his Mom had custody or his bank VP grandma, the typical white person? Columbo–find out!

  32. Star, on August 3rd, 2008 at 11:48 AM Said:

    I also heard he hurt his hip playing all this basketball and sought med attn. Not widely publicized, tho McCain’s biopsy (neg) was. People here in AZ get those things taken off several times a yr. Anyhow, Junior is 46 or something–this is the age when all this loping, bounding, and leaping around can spring something! I don’t care how scrawny he is, the tendons and ligaments begin to stiffen up.

  33. just me, on August 3rd, 2008 at 1:29 PM Said:

    jmk

    I went to see Mamma Mia too yesterday what a blast…
    Julie Walters and the other actor forgot her name were awesome. Yes I agree a great PUMA movie.
    I needed it to release the garbage from this Obama campaign…

  34. Patti, on August 3rd, 2008 at 2:07 PM Said:

    I also smell patchouli.

  35. thetownecrier, on August 3rd, 2008 at 6:59 PM Said:

    Seems like OBabbles has forgotten where all these things on Columbos list are, because he has been busy.
    http://quipster.wordpress.com/2008/08/03/barack-obongo-munchies-for-all/
    Ha ha.

  36. NoEmptySuits, on August 4th, 2008 at 12:01 AM Said:

    Dear Uppity, loved the “incense and myrrh” comment! You definitely have a (lapsed?) catholic sensitivity.

    With respect to your comment on Rezko, so true. Speaking of Rezko, I wish you’d write about it. Is there any question Obama was the Senate connection for Rezko and his network? No. The trouble with the Rezko issue is that it’s complicated and no one’s been able to break it up into easily digestible, understandable pieces. You have that talent. The prosecutor involved, Patrick Fitzgerald (a nortoriously understated, non-grandstanding fellow), tellingly described the Rezko case as “Pay-To-Play-On-Steroids.”

  37. Uppity Woman, on August 4th, 2008 at 12:13 AM Said:

    You really ARE good at what you do NES! As a matter of fact, I AM a former Catholic. I left the church decades ago, long before the rush, so to speak.

    Now about Rezko. I never delved into that slime bag’s situation because my good friend at http://rezkowatch.blogspot.com/ kept us on the edge of our seats with not only a total detailed history of that pig and his ties to OBigHead, but RW also gave us a day-by-day, blow-by-blow trial account. Everything there is to know about Barack’s Uncle Tony is there. Rezkowatch has moved now to http://therealbarackobama.wordpress.com

    This blogger is awesome and, I do confess, we are partners in crime fairly often.

  39. Ah…Sorry To Bother You Mr. Obama, Sir «, on September 6th, 2008 at 10:12 AM Said:

    [...] see this piece anywhere, I would appreciate if you would tell the person posting it and give them this link as the original publication. Then let me know where my piece is posted and I will take care of the [...]

  41. Uppity Woman, on September 8th, 2008 at 9:24 AM Said:

    UPDATE GOT A NICE EMAIL FROM THIS PERSON. WE ARE ALL SQUARED AWAY. WAY TO GO MATT!
    First let me say that I do NOT want you folks leaving messages at this blog. The person is generally innocent and just doesn’t Get it. So let me handle it. HEY NES????

    NES. I may need your services. UPDATE: NO LONGER.
    Do you see the pingback directly above this comment? I have to tell you that I have had incredibly good luck with contacted people who posted my original August 2 publication of this reprinted piece. People have just been great. Some just deleted the post, others block quoted and provided the original link. I even made some great friends out of it. Very cool people who recognized instantly that somebody lifted my work, sent it viral and they would have happily credited me if they only know. Everybody was pretty much great—- except this person.

    I provided this person with the original publication links to this blog and to No Quarter. So what does the person do?

    Call me “Some genius” who is “Trying” to take credit for a viral email her dad got and forwarded it to her. I suspect this is a young person. I am trying to be patient here, but it looks like I will have to have someone contact her legally.

    I will never understand why people don’t understand that posting intellectual property that way is just plain not acceptable.

    Here is the message I just left her. I do hope I don’t have to do this the hard way for her sake.

    “I received your pingback and so have all my readers.

    Seriously, you are actually the only blogger I have this kind of trouble with on the correction regarding my intellectual property being improperly posted.

    The “email” you received was passed around by the person who lifted my intellectual property, which was legitmately and proven published at my blog on August 2 and at the large political site No Quarter. Your dad was simply one of the recipients of a viral email. Like you, he had no idea that this was the property of a legitimate writer with a name.

    I have provided you with the proof of two legitimate publications on August 2 and August 3. I am sure your posting of this piece as “anonymous” is innocent, but your refusal to recognize my copyrighted material is not.

    I found this piece posted at a minimum of a dozen sites. Not one of them was anything but understanding. They all either block quoted the piece and inserted the rightful link or they deleted the piece entirely. I urge you to reconsider your position on this.

    Think of it this way: If I were to break into your home and take your plasma TV and give it to someone else, would this make it the rightful property of the owner? Well it’s kind of like that.

    I would truly like to resolve this amicably and am certainly trying to do so. But please
    Consider this message a cease and desist. Your next communication will be from my legal representative after tracking of your server to secure your needed information. I dislike this thought entirely, and I hope you do as well. I simply want recognition for my own hard work. As I said before, I take my professional writing seriously, and that includes my blogging work.

    Signed
    “Some genius”

    Your comment is awaiting moderation.
    Uppity Woman
    September 8th, 2008 at 7:57 am
    “

  42. Vernell Jennings, on September 12th, 2008 at 8:49 PM Said:

    If this guy becomes president ….I will start a petician to impeach the entire government in Washington of all of the officials . So far they are just one big mob of theives and liers that we can never trust and all they do is steal our money and never listen . What ever happened to ” For The People By The People ” ?? We have no vote or say so about anything at all and we are treated like we are too stupid to stand up for ourselves and that we need to be ruled around by a corrupt government . I’m fed up with it !! How come a husband and wife that paid into S.S. all their lives can only get one check after we worked our butts off paying into it ?? That’s our money !! The government is stealing it and then sends out a stimulas packet and all of the gas prices go up at the same time so they could get it all back ! What a joke !!

  43. Don Billings, on September 19th, 2008 at 11:45 AM Said:

    I think it would be a Christian act, to take up a collection in order to allow the previous submitter, Vernell Jennings, to return to school so he can continue his education. Apparently he was forced to drop out prior to completing the second grade, because he had to seek employment in order to support his wife and six children.

  44. Uppity Woman, on September 19th, 2008 at 11:55 AM Said:

    Be nice! Not all commenters are perfect like you are!

  45. nan, on September 26th, 2008 at 5:59 PM Said:

    why doesn’t anyone talk about obama’s heavy smoking and the risk he already has of getting lung cancer/mother and some grandfather died of cancer, as well. they are talking about mccain skin cancer.

  46. Uppity Woman, on September 26th, 2008 at 6:10 PM Said:

    Because he doesn’t smoke any longer. Snicker…

  47. Uppity Woman, on September 26th, 2008 at 6:11 PM Said:

    Nan join us over at the newer threads ok?

  48. POLITISCH KORREKT » Tut mir leid, Herre!, on September 30th, 2008 at 8:45 AM Said:

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  49. jack dempsy, on October 14th, 2008 at 9:52 PM Said:

    you are using copyrighted pictures on this blog there fore you are in violation of the copyright law

    have fun

  50. Uppity Woman, on October 14th, 2008 at 9:56 PM Said:

    Bzzz. Sorry Jack, but this picture is from a Fair Use public poster. And while you are at it, stick it in your ass, pissant. When I want any further shit from you, I will squeeze your head.

    Have fun yourself.

  51. deadenders, on October 14th, 2008 at 10:03 PM Said:

    HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

  52. Uppity Woman, on October 14th, 2008 at 10:03 PM Said:

    Oh, and “therefore is” one word. You need to stop cutting English class for the Comrade’s Glorious Cause.

  53. Uppity Woman, on October 14th, 2008 at 10:04 PM Said:

    LOL Scott. These Obamazoids are practicing for the Youth Corps Civilian Army. Later, he will want to turn in his parents. But not before he spends all their money!

  54. Obama’s American Socialism: Decades In The Making, Part II | Logistics Monster, on October 26th, 2008 at 3:35 AM Said:

    [...] the question: Why does a candidate for President of the United States and Leader Of The Free World hide his past and create a situation where all of this investigative research, and chasing the truth down rabbit [...]

  55. Prertendidential Sneakitude « Cinie’s World, on June 11th, 2009 at 8:37 AM Said:

    [...] If The Bible Says It’s Okay, Not!” stance, it’s not so much about waffling, but, Columbo-style bumbling to catch the unwary in his trap, and keep them amused and busy while he does what he wants [...]

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