Don’t step on that cockroach!

Do NOT step on that cockroach in your kitchen.

If he’s there, there are plenty more where he came from! Humor him! He’s your friend. Just tell me where you live, so I make sure I never visit. However, continue on as usual with your friend the cockroach. In fact, you should encourage more of them to visit. You just may be helping medical science by collecting as many as you can.

 

Let's name him Rahm.

Unlike the two-legged cockroaches, many of whom hold seats in Congress and Czar jobs, and who do nothing for us but take our money  and ruin our lives, the real cockroach is being studied as the next antibiotic savior against super bugs.

It seems that, because cockroaches love to hang out in filth (your kitchen notwithstanding, of course!), their brains have developed ways to fend off other things as disgusting as they are, but which are more apt to kill you–such as e Coli. Too bad they also CARRY the deadly bacteria, but don’t let that stop you from starting a cockroach farm, okay? When was the last time a cockroach died from e Coli, do you know? See what I mean?

Cockroach brains may be a source of new antibiotics capable of killing deadly drug-resistant bacteria, according to research that suggests the germ-spreading pests may be good for something after all.

Insects such as cockroaches have a defense mechanism against bacteria, a “logical” development from living in unhygienic conditions, research from the U.K.’s University of Nottingham showed. Tissues from the brains and nervous systems of cockroaches and locusts killed more than 90 percent of MRSA and E. coli without damaging human cells, scientists said.

Research has shown cockroaches to spread germs linked to allergic reactions and asthma in the home and drug-resistant bacteria in hospitals. Invasive MRSA, or methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus, is a hospital-acquired infection that sickens about 90,000 people and kills 15,000 in the U.S. every year, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta.

“Insects often live in unsanitary and unhygienic environments where they encounter many different types of bacteria,” Simon Lee, a postgraduate researcher who led the study, said in a statement yesterday. “It is therefore logical that they have developed ways of protecting themselves against micro-organisms.”

Just think of what a boon this will be to all our filthy, disgusting Big Agra food processors who ship their deadly bacteria free of charge in their poultry, vegetables, eggs, beef, and, increasingly,  just about everything else we eat while we pray. I’ll bet they already have plenty of cockroaches around, along with rats and their droppings. Now they can increase profits by raising those cockroaches and contributing to science, so that one day we will be able to ward off all the deadly diseases we are subject to simply by participating in that silly, unnecessary pastime known as eating. It beats cleaning things up in food production and distribution, doesn’t it?

Science is amazing, isn’t it? I mean, if they can take a horrible thing like botulism and use it constructively to place a permanent grimmace on Nancy Pelosi’s face, there is no end to what they can do for us with cockroaches. I just hope that the resulting antibiotic doesn’t result in a sudden urge to hang out under sinks and only come out at night.

The truth is, cockroaches have always evolved their survival skills  faster and better than we have. Just goes to show you how smart we really are.

34 Responses

  1. OMG! That thing is gross! Its so late I can hardly take this in. So what’s supposed to happen here? Are we supposed to eat the cockroach brains to fight off the ecoli, or are they just going start squashing cockroaches heads to start spreading their antibiotic super goo all over our disgustingly contaminated food supply?

    Yummy! Cockroach brains! Its whats for dinner!!!

  2. I wonder what company(ies) is (are) funding this research and what the terms of disclosure are. Reason – there was a kerfuffle years ago, where pharma was funding a study. The head of the research determined that the drug they (Pharma) had developed had very detrimental side effects and published – Pharma sued the researcher because under the terms of the contract, she was to have presented her findings to them and gotten their okay to publish. Small problem, she did present them, they refused to allow publication, she found out later they were moving ahead despite the results, so she published. She won the case, btw.

  3. Just when you thought things can’t possibly get much worse than they are now.

    Enough to make most people lose their appetite.

    BLT hold the bugs.

  4. Hey karen, how ya doing? Raided any fridges lately?

  5. “Roach Coach” takes on a whole new meaning….

  6. Uppity,

    O/T – Happy, healthy and prosperous New Year to all! Oy, and I’m not even Jewish…

    -MS

  7. No no no! You won’t be eastng cockroaches! You will be swallowing antibiotics created from their brains. I’m thinking, why don’t they just find a good use for e coli and salmonella instead, since we have even more of that around than cockroaches now.

  8. Just kidding.

    I’m sure they are STUDYING their brains to see what it is they produced that makes them immune to the things that kill us in our food.

  9. Ok, well maybe they will extract a teeny tiny thing from their brains. You’ll hardly notice.

    The thing is, cockroaches have evolved and we haven’t! Cripes, no wonder they’be been here longer than we have.

  10. Good morning (((((Uppity’s))))))))

    Lord knows all this good news everyday,
    is very unappetizing.

    cockroaches to save the world from disease,
    God these people are insane as they can be.

    On to the good fight——-

  11. sorry, don’t know if unappetizing is a word,
    don’t want to upset our teachers around here,
    but you get my meaning—–

  12. Hi All:

    Well gee, other cultures (in Africa, India and other third world countries) eat bugs. Who hasn’t eaten a choc covered ant on a dare? Hal did a few times. He is still kicking. Must be the protein in ants. Rememjber the Indiana Jones film Temple of Doom set in India where they ate huge ”crunchy” bugs as an appetizer? It wasn’t reflective of palace cuisine, but is important part of the diet of millions of the little people in India…bugs, that is. Cockroaches? Who knows?

    The other day, DE sayeth: “I’M MELLTTINNGG!” after puttering in the attic and losing 3 whole pounds! (Gasp= methinks he stole a line from the Wicked Witch of the West) At any rate, Angie loves the new, slimmer DE…not that she didn’t love the old one.

    DE & others wrap your heads around this = Hal is 6-4 197 or WAS before gut surgery Aug 12. He dropped to 170 in less than a month. No food, no water, just that saline IV drip. I wouldn’t recommend this as a diet plan.

    Pass the bugs…………🙂

  13. Eh Hal, I knew you’d win.

  14. EWWWWWWWWWW

  15. Hal, so glad to see you’re getting better. I was thinking about you this morning (not because of the cockroaches), so it’s a relief to read you, you skinny fella.

  16. The show, can’t think of it right off hand:

    FEAR FACTOR—it was a contest, some of the
    most GROSSEST EATING they did, and cockroaches
    and bugs, and animal guts were part of it all.

    It didn’t kill them, but it sure did make me sick,
    Not even for $1 million dollars (the prize)—could I stick it in my mouth. Just imagine if it still lived in your body,
    the damage it could do————and they want to make anitbiotics out of the brain of cockroaches—-how do tey know it has a brain——it’s so small—-

    any scientists around here

  17. I guess restaurants infested with roaches will now get an “A” rating from the Health Dept.

  18. …eyes darting….hiding the rack of ribs…

    Is…is…Karen here?

  19. Akunat Matata…no worries

  20. EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

    maybe they plan to clone them…

    Grotesque.

  21. Well that’s certainly interesting, but hey quite often a medical breakthrough comes from the strangest places and also from lab mistakes so who knows.

    Hal good to see you posting!! I hope you’re recovery is uneventful and swift!

  22. I can see an uptick on Roach Motels. This article really made me laugh, Uppity. Particularly here:

    “Science is amazing, isn’t it? I mean, if they can take a horrible thing like botulism and use it constructively to place a permanent grimmace on Nancy Pelosi’s face, there is no end to what they can do for us with cockroaches.”

    Poor Nancy! They’re going have to send in vats of Botox to rescue Nancy’s face once November starts.

    Thanks for the smile [entirely natural, of course :0)]

  23. Valentine, cockroaches do a pretty good job of cloning themselves.

  24. Off topic Uppity, but still speaking of cockroaches, Tim Kaine, head of the DNC, was on John Stewart last night. It was brutal. I mean brutal. The Daily show, Stewart, those are Dem friendly people, and Kaine wouldn’t even listen to them. He was so out of touch with what Stewart was saying, it was like there was simply no communicating with him. If anybody missed it, it’s a pretty fascinating interview. Stewart pulled no punches.

  25. Good grief, does she has any sense of taste at all? That dress is – well tacky is what comes to mind.

  26. It’s nice to know Imelda and Ferdinand are in touch with the country with their ‘White House Dance Series”.

  27. Once they create a market for cockroach brains, then we get cockroach ranches, then we will get giant genetically modified cockroaches, then we will get the accidental release of said giant genetically modified cockroaches into the wild. Ooopsie. Cockroach Armageddon.

  28. The Washington Post has been running articles again about Imelda the fabulous fashion icon. The latest twist was trying to say she was a marvelous “tourist” and that, of course, the wee ones are fashion icons in the making.

    I wonder how they will spin the leopard and lace frock (with mighty utility tire belt) by one of Barbie’s (yes, the plastic doll) most popular designers. Come to think of it, by the time they are done photo shopping Imelda in those awful ensembles, the image is as close to reality as Barbie’s measurements and permanently arched feet.

  29. Uppity, I was just being silly. I knew we weren’t going to eat them. It was 3 or 4 in the morning here & couldn’t sleep. FF, love the roach coach gag!

  30. What is it with the wide belt under the breasts? It cuts her right off. I flipped through some of the photos; there’s one with the same sort of belt worn with a coat.

    On the other hand, there a couple really beautiful evening gowns. The one designed by N.Khan was stunning. But all the garish floral prints and that signature belt? They should go, toute suite.

    Never a dull moment in Obamaland. And an endless lesson from the media: look, even if it looks awful, this is a fashion icon. Translation? Don’t trust your lying eyes.

  31. That video is icky, but hilarious!

    So then are we to expect the next wave of megapower antibiotics in the hospital will be derived from cockroach brains and spinal cords? They will have little cockroach images on the IV bags with big long antennae to signal to all the importance of the recipient.

  32. […] miss Tamerlane’s Charge of the Lightbringer Brigade, or food fit for cockroaches. OHM nom nom […]

  33. More two legged cockroaches….

    “On an Oct. 15, 2007, conference call with analysts and investors, Crittenden said the company’s “subprime exposure” was $13 billion at the end of second quarter and had declined during the third quarter.

    The figure he cited omitted “super-senior” tranches of collateralized debt obligations and financial guarantees known as liquidity puts that allowed customers to sell debt securities back to Citigroup if credit markets froze, the SEC said. Those products added more than $40 billion of subprime risk that the bank didn’t disclose, the SEC said.”

    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2010-09-09/prince-rubin-knew-assets-at-focus-of-sec-claim-fueled-losses-agency-says.html

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