I survived the Rapture again! And it looks like everybody else did too!

C…C…Can I come out now?

I survived! You survived! We all survived! That Thieving Freak Harold Camping, who made multitudinous millions with his bogus bullsh!t predictions appears to have been the only person raptured, since he has mysteriously disappeared.  His radio show has been cancelled and nobody knows where the H this charlatan is–and I can assure you it’s not heaven. Make no mistake, this dirtbag is sipping Mojitos somewhere, you evangelical  crackpot suckers! How many of these does it take for you to recognize just how freaking STUPID you all really are? Just asking! Morons! The very best you can hope for now that you have been swindled TWICE by this scumball is……he got smited. Now that would be a great example of both divine intervention and poetic justice all rolled into one.

Swindlers aside, I survived this year’s first AND second Rapture Dates! Unfortunately, the psycho Jesus Freak who lives across the road from me is still here too. And my one remaining evangelical friend is truly bummed out. He gave away all his porn DVDs and now he has to start all over again. He is really sulking now, because he swears some of those films were Classics. He’s a Republican. You can automatically know this because, if he were a Democrat, he would have known he wasn’t going anywhere and would have never let go of that vintage copy of Talk Dirty To Me.

So now I am stuck here with my carry-up bag and a crapload of peanut butter crackers I packed for the trip. And 24 Dramamines. I even bought new underwear because my mother was really big on that thing about not landing in the hospital half-dead with old underwear. I figured it applied to Raptures too.

I didn’t pay the mortgage or my Bank Of America credit card and now I have a penalty and they will probably raise the rate to 30%.

I spent three days eating everything that wasn’t good for my weight or health and now I feel like crap.

I had wild unprotected sex a whole bunch of times and now Mr. Uppity thinks we should do that all the time. This probably occurred because I threw off all those layers of clothing I was wearing because I didn’t want to get cold at 15,000 feet. I figured, screw this, if they are going to take me, they are going to have to take me naked. Apparently, Mr. U took this literally. Should I get pregnant, I already have a name picked out: Surprise. Or perhaps Miracle would be more appropriate.

I didn’t do any laundry and now it’s all staring at me. And besides that, I paid those G’Damned atheists up front to look after my pets for eternity, and who knew I could get you Uppityites to not only take them for free, but fight over them. Well, okay, you fought over the dog. Nobody wanted Bill. He’s not going to forget that. Just remember, when he strikes, I can’t help you.

Before midnight yesterday, I told off three people who could have really hurt me if there wasn’t going to be a Rapture and now I am just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

WP Warden and her Holy Subaru.

So, tell me, who do I sue for this Rapture Bullcrap?

I mean my life is so screwed up now that I may just have to turn to God or something. I can’t go after the nutbag who started all of this in May, because all she’s got is that fugly Subaru with the Rapture crap painted all over it. In the words of my late mother, never sue somebody who has less than you do-especially if it appears that they only have three cans left in their mental six-pack.

I suppose I should consider myself lucky compared to some people. For example, this congenital moron spent down his life savings ahead of May 21. I do hope he hasn’t reproduced.  I supposed he WISHED he could be raptured yesterday, since he’s broke.

Thanks for the millions, suckholes!

Here’s Mr. Harold Camping’s original Rapture “math”. No kidding. You can’t make this shit up. I’m sure he adjusted it for October 21, and all the morons hopped right on. Once again, I am compelled to point out that this creature suckered you twice, you idiots! God must be so embarrassed to know you imagine yourself as one of His.

“Christ hung on the cross April 1, 33 A.D.,” he began. “Now go to April 1 of 2011 A.D., and that’s 1,978 years.”

Camping then multiplied 1,978 by 365.2422 days – the number of days in each solar year, not to be confused with a calendar year.

Next, Camping noted that April 1 to May 21 encompasses 51 days. Add 51 to the sum of previous multiplication total, and it equals 722,500.

Camping realized that (5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500.

Or put into words: (Atonement x Completeness x Heaven), squared.

“Five times 10 times 17 is telling you a story,” Camping said. “It’s the story from the time Christ made payment for your sins until you’re completely saved.

I’m rolling my eyes here. How can anyone imagine that God would be caught standing next to a mental case who would buy this crap?

Ah well, at least I’m still alive, right? And nobody got a dime from me! Because I don’t care what all these freaks say, death is wayyyyyyyyyyyyy over-rated. And you don’t get DoOvers! I know for a fact that all those evangelicals agree, too, because, for all their talk about wanting to go be with Jesus, just as soon as they get sick enough to notice that God might be taking them up on their wish, they fight like maniacs not to go. No kidding. They will let doctors poke, prod and ingest toxins into their bodies just to STAY HERE.

I do want you all to know that I wouldn’t have let you down if I had been raptured. I already figured out how to blog to you during and after Rapture. I planned to steal some dumbbell’s bandwidth. I figured this is why God gave wireless to fools on unprotected networks.

Okay, now we have to go mow the lawn because we didn’t bother yesterday. Bummer. But at least we’re here. But have no fear!  There will be ANOTHER Rapture Day, and that  decrepit dipwad Camping will probably resurface for it and make yet another 80 million on it. There is ALWAYS another Rapture Day. It’s a guarantee, like death, taxes and Barack going golfing.

But more importantly, I see that you all Survived The Rapture too. Because if you went and I didn’t, why the hell would I bother writing more blog posts? The interesting thing is, nobody I know got Raptured. Perhaps this is an indicator of my bad taste in friends or something.

Real Christian doing God's Work

……But if everybody from Uppityville is still here too, just remember… we will do this again. And again. And again!

…..This means all the End Times crazies are right now planning that next rapture date, because enjoying life and having a positive thought process is just a bummer for these people.

It’s just so good to know that the same moronic superstitious crazy-asses who fall for this rapture crap every damned year — are going to use their same impeccable discernment skills to pick the next Republican candidate for President.

Meanwhile here’s the perfect song for EVERY SINGLE BULLSH!TTING RAPTURE PREDICTOR since time began. You are all FULL OF CRAP and should be SUCKED DOWN BODILY INTO HELL WITHOUT EVEN DYING FIRST.


97 Responses

  1. Ah shucks another false alarm!! Not to worry there will be another one soon, I’m sure.

    I guess we can all start getting ready for 12-21-2012 now.

  2. I’m sending this to all those who were not selected for the rapture. I’m sitting in heaven enjoying a wild game of Texas Hold-em poker with Richard Nixon, Frank Zappa, and Curly Howard. It’s really nice here…bit hot….stinks like sulfur a little…lotsa preachers around

  3. For socalannie and others who asked, a repost… if I’d known another post was imminent, I’d’ve waited. Sorry ’bout that.


    I have the recipe written in about five cookbooks (it was a recipe my eldest sister found back in the 70s and became a family hit). Here’s the essential core of the recipe:


    It looks correct when compared it to my memory. The changes we did make were 1) shred instead of chop the apples, saves tons of time, and 2) instead of two cups of apples, more like around four.The more apples, the moister the cake… but also you will want to make the baking time a tiny bit longer. And you wouldn’t think that using grannies instead of red delicious would make much of a difference, but it does, and it’s very subtle. Any variety of apples will do, though, and we actually mixed and matched with whatever we had around. And 3) we just dump the whole bag of choc chips in. In for a penny, in for a pound.

    Add chunks of nuts if you prefer – I like walnuts in mine.

    While the batter itself smells glorious, the scent as it bakes is sublime.

  4. Allie, thanks. I’m definitely going to make this.

  5. Wow Upps, you’re back! Hilarious post. We missed you. Don’t miss NeedleNose too much – she’s doing marvelously.

  6. Jay, just checking……any sign of a guy with a funny looking mustache speaking german?

  7. Here’s a headline you don’t see every day:

    Woman allegedly beaten with frozen armadillo

  8. I’m feeling a little deja vu here. This oh so reminded me of the last survival post. Thank dog you survived. This place just wouldn’t be the same without you. Where did Bill get the idea no one wanted him?


    Bill, you’re more than welcomed to crash here for awhile. The dogs will even share the bed.


    Sir MKB, you can come & live with us. You can share lakers room, you should get along just fine. You both like to be spoiled and love good food.

    There may have been others. There is lots of LOVE for Bill here. If you ever do get raptured Upps, I’ll come get him. If he doesn’t want to share the bed, I’ll get him his own. He would love it here.

  9. Well thank goodness you’re back. Though how you will get the dog back I don’t know.
    As for MKBill – I wish it to be noted that he had a few offers- none of which he accepted. Bill was hanging out at Anthony’s- drinking Lattes on the porch. With Bailey’s I think.
    No wonder he did not want to come here.

  10. Yes Viv, I did indeed plagiarize myself. I plan on suing myself for it too.

    I want my dog back. Now. Give me my dog back, NES. I can give her commands remotely, you know. Besides, I hope she blows her coat all over your house.

  11. “Doesn’t the Second Amendment give us the right to bear ARM adillos?”

  12. Well, I finally left the porch for a little while yesterday, only to hear the endless droning of “Teh One” on the teevee taking credit for everything under the sun.

    I bet I missed the Rapture-Mobile. Damn!!!!

    Can’t stay on the porch any more – neighbors are laughing.

    Moving me my suitcase to the roof, where there are outlets to plug in the cappucino machine. Bet there will be another Rapture date soon. I just need to get away from the endless babble of the soon-to-be-gone “One”

    Even the dog is gone…..

  13. Anthony, they didn’t take us and they didn’t even tell us why, or reschedule or something. I hate when that happens.

  14. Hey Anthony, what’s with the gag order over at your place? Do you need me to send Bill to straighten things out?

  15. Oh good. You truly are back. I was wondering after I read the post. “Is it you, or is it memorex”? I do enjoy reading your post over and over. I lied to you when I told you my memory wasn’t that great. It is.

    I just want to thank the dogs again for your safe return. Welcome back Upps.

  16. Well actually there was some significant work that went into the rewrite, you know.

  17. I know. I read the other as well. I did see quite a bit of difference.

  18. Whew! Everyone’s still here, too!

    Next time, I think I’ll wait for my departure in an all-night Jazz Bar, requesting my favorite songs – rather than my closet, changing into my favorite shoes.

    Well, Ghadaffi made it – so I guess until the right “leadership” was in place, things weren’t quite ready for the real one?

  19. Get to go to work. Have a great post-no one, but Ghadaffi, was raptured weekend. lol.

  20. Hey Why Not. Good thing you didn’t tell your boss off before Rapture Day.

  21. I can’t believe how dumb and useless our press is. They are making a big fuss over Al Gore robbing taxpayer’s of half a billion to build a car in Finland. I covered that in 2009. These people are uesless. I know Mom posted the link yesterday, but our useless press is worse than our politicians.
    Al Gore’s “People’s Car”. Starts at only $89k. The robbery dates all the way back to June 2009. Nice job, “journalists”!

  22. The press is a day late, and a dollar short on that news. Did they plagiarize you? Where’s your lawyer?

  23. vivien! I had the exact same thought last night! The press is so far behind it is not funny.
    Wait- does this mean they will finally get around to vetting teh one? Cuz all the work was done by the blogs in 07 and 08- they can just steal it.

  24. Does this mean I don’t get to dog sit needle nose now?

  25. They didn’t plagiarize anybody. You can’t plagiarize facts. You can choose to ignore them though, until they meet your needs. The press is simply either deliberately remiss, corrupt and complicit…or they are developmentally disabled. You pick.

    If you ask me, they save stories for when it suits them. We are being manipulated daily in this way.

    As you can see from my link, the wall street journal covered this in 2009 as well. There is no excuse for the rest of the press pretending they just figured this out.

  26. BCL, since I know how you feel about Der Nadel, I am going to give you blanket visitation privileges and she can humansit YOU.

  27. If you ask me, they save stories for when it suits them. We are being manipulated daily in this way.

    Ayup. So that makes me wonder why all the coverage of Solyndra, Fast and Furious, etc. now? The press is turning against him- pretending they are SHOCKED! They – the press- are just as responsible as the DNC for foisting this fraud on this country. Had they done the job the press is meant to do- he would never have been elected. They propped him up and fawned over him and helped float the fairy tale. They are guilty as hell.

  28. Thank you, thank you, Uppity.

  29. If you ask me, they save stories for when it suits them.

    You are right about that. It really make you wonder. “What is an October surprise”? It’s something the press has been sitting on, waiting for October to roll around. They suck!

  30. Oh well one October SUrprise is that movie SONY is making all about how wonderful barack obama is and how he killed osama bin laden with his bare hands.

  31. You are welcome BCL, but I do warn you. She is habit forming.

  32. Perhaps part of the reason the press is suddenly seeing the corruption of Obama is his falling poll numbers. People are not buying their phony stories any more so they are starting to lift the veil. Media credibility is shot nobody watches. Can’t happen to a more deserving bunch.

  33. well we are still here.Welcome back Upps. 🙂

  34. NeedleNose has certain demands she wants satisfied if she’s to return:

    — her own room, no smaller than your bedroom;
    — a king-size doggy bed;
    — treats on demand, no begging precondition;
    — home-cooked meals, twice a day;
    — blogging privileges at your site;
    — walks six times a day;
    — the right to have 2 additional desires satisfied every month, into perpetuity; and
    — a monthly dinner invite to your house for NES and her partner (complete with directions to the house).

    Sign on the dotted line, and NeedleNose will be returned to you within 48 hours’ notice that all the logistics attendant upon her demands have been taken care of.

  35. I guess we can all start getting ready for 12-21-2012 now.

    I’m going to go out on a tin foil limb here and suggest that the recent string of ad hoc rapture announcements and subsequent failures is a ploy to get people to ignore the real end of days. It’s 12/21/2012. Accept no substitutes.

  36. Zero’s embarrassing loss:

    Defections by Senate Dems hamper Obama’s message on jobs
    By Bob Cusack – 10/21/11 12:32 PM ET
    Democratic defections and a united Republican front are hampering President Obama’s message on the economy.

    Last week and again Thursday night, there were a couple Democratic defections on Obama’s jobs measure. And despite a veto threat from the White House, 10 Democrats voted for a GOP alternative.

    The lack of a united front is complicating a key part of Obama’s reelection strategy of running against Washington, and Congress in particular.

    Obama has been lambasting the politics of Capitol Hill, and some say a few stray Democratic votes will prevent that message from resonating with voters in 2012.
    Others claim that Democratic votes against Obama’s jobs bills will be cited repeatedly next year by Republicans, who are determined to show Obama has failed to lead.

    The White House stresses that a large majority of Democrats are solidly behind their president.

    “Let’s be clear. Ninety-five percent of Senate Democrats voted to put teachers and first responders back to work. Exactly 0 percent of Senate Republicans joined them,” White House press secretary Jay Carney told The Hill on Friday.

    “The bill failed because Senate Republicans blocked it. Senate Republicans decided they would not ask millionaires and billionaires to pay a little bit more in order to put up to 400,000 teachers in our classrooms teaching our children.”

    The Republican measure offered on the floor Thursday night won more votes than Obama’s proposal.

  37. Nice try NES. LOLOL.

    She’ll just escape. Face it, NES, she’s my dog and that’s the way she likes it. Let her come home or she will blow her coat on my command. That’s not gonna be pretty, NES. Not pretty at all. Just open the door. She’ll get here herself. Haven’t you ever seen Lassie?

  38. Hey Foxy, I knew you had about as much a chance of being Rapturized as I did.

  39. Lizzy the truth is, the press no longer has any creds and they know it. They do everything for ratings and even that doesn’t work, most times. They do just fine with Inquirer type stories and hollywood bullcrap. When it comes to hard news, the internet ruined their lives long ago, considering the UK does our news that they fail to cover. They have nowhere to go, nowhere to hide. They are all nothing but entertainers now. Except the NY TImes, which is working hard at the revival of Pravda. Their junk rating is befitting of the quality of their work. Then there’s MSNBC and FOX. Two sides of the same manipulative coin preaching to their own choirs. I won’t even get into CNN, because I don’t even know WHAT the hell they are. All I know is I never go there any longer. I think the last straw for me with them was when they ran the same old Gupta and Anderson clips all weekend after the Haiti Quake. Too lazy to work the weekend while people were devastated. Despicable. I knew they were useless when they dumped Aaron Brown, who actually did objective news, and replaced him with All Anderson All The Time. The WSJ does do some good coverage but you have to sift through their agenda to get there sometimes. Basically, if I want to get the USA news, I check the blogs and the UK now. I know people are enamoured with Al Jeeze, but the truth is, their anti American agenda annoys the crap out of me. Basically, local area newspapers do a better job for us. If it comes out of NY Central, it’s propaganda and everybody knows it now.

  40. NES wait till a bunch of democrats up for re-election snub his ass and tell him they don’t want him to campaign for them.

  41. What I hate most about Obama’s bogus jobs bills is, he only wants to create public sector jobs, something we hardly need more of. Then the funding dries up or the funding has to be matched, which means the local taxpayers get another tax hike up their butts to keep the employees employed. I won’t even get into the added pension burden.. It’s the same old story and it ALWAYS costs the property taxpayers dearly. The man has no sense of the private sector. None whatsoever, considering he himself has been on the public teat all of his life.

  42. Saudi Arabia and their ali baba bullchit. The successor to the throne died at age 80-something and King Abdullah picks this 78 year old cretin as his successor. Abdulla is 87 and he promised that women can vote in 2015 after all the riots. That means he’ll be dead before it ever happens. and then therre’s this cretin. It’s hard to believe they live in the same century as everybody else. Saudi women should really kill these creatures in their sleep on the same night.

    Nayef, 78, has earned U.S. praise for unleashing the internal security forces against suspected Islamic extremist cells in Saudi Arabia, which was home to 15 of 19 of the Sept. 11 hijackers. Yet he brought blistering rebukes in the West for a 2002 interview that quoted him as saying that “Zionists” – a reference to Jews – benefited from the 9-11 attacks because it turned world opinion against Islam and Arabs.

    Nayef also has expressed displeasure at some of Abdullah’s moves for more openness, saying in 2009 that he saw no need for women to vote or participate in politics. It’s a view shared by many Saudi clerics, who follow a strict brand of Islam known as Wahhabism. Their support gives the Saudi monarchy the legitimacy to rule over a nation holding Islam’s holiest sites.

    “Nayef is more religious, and is closer to the Saudi groups who are very critical of the king’s decisions regarding women and other steps he’s taken to balance out the rigid religious practices in society,” said Ali Fakhro, a political analyst and commentator in Bahrain.

    But it remains doubtful that Nayef – if ever made king – would outright annul Abdullah’s reforms, which include the establishment of a coed university where both genders can mix. More likely, Nayef would put any further changes on hold, said Abdulkhaleq Abdulla, a political affairs professor at Emirates University.

  43. NES, always the sharp attorney! She’s going to get that address yet! lol

    a monthly dinner invite to your house for NES and her partner (complete with directions to the house).

  44. Ok Upps, NeedleNose has dropped her demands to two, as follows:

    – blogging privileges at your site; and
    – a monthly dinner invite to your house for NES and her partner (complete with directions to the house).

  45. You are so right about the news. CNN lost me when they screwed up the morning show. I was heartbroken when they got rid of Aaron Brown. I thought of myself as a news junkie, that was all I ever watched. I don’t watch anymore. I get most of my news online. I read my paper online, then go pick it up off the porch, and read the part that doesn’t get online. Never lose the word in print. I have a friend at work that tells me that anytime saving a tree in mentioned. I get alot of news here.That I am grateful for.

    You not watching CNN made me remember something you wrote. I couldn’t tell you what post it was in, or what it was even about. You said, “Sanjay saved that same baby so many times, the kid clearly had nine lives.” Don’t ask me how I can remember that, and forget my own parents anniversary every year.

    If you need any help getting the dog back, count me in.

  46. I was the one with coffee and Baileys. Anthony had latte cups littering his porch. C’mon over, Bill, in december. It’ll be nice weather here, too.

  47. Glad the rapture is over and all the Uppityites are back, safe and sound! Great post! That idiots rapture math was hysterical. He’s probably down on a beach in Brazil somewhere. Idiots.

    Hubbie knows a couple of of guys that are over in Saudi, and when they were home, they told him a lot of stories. One of them, who is over as part of a building/engineering teaching group says, that no matter how hard he tries to emphasize correct and safe construction, they refuse to learn and keep doing their neanderthal construction practices, stuff that will crumble to the ground in an earthquake and help spread smoke in a fire. He says the compound living is really strange, they keep all the different nationalities separate, and they can’t wear shorts becuz it shows their legs.

    Another guy is there becuz he is a landscape specialist for growing in sand. He says he is making tons of money, and they are always buying him designer gifts like Gucci and stuff. He sends it home to his wife and they sell it on ebay!

  48. We offered to take MKB on a tour of all the fun places here in socal. We would post lots of pix of him in famous places and with rock stars and movie stars. Come west, MKB, great weather and tons of fun!

  49. We love coffee and Baileys. It would go great with Allies apple chocolate chip cake!

  50. That’s right Upps. socalannie did have the best offer for Bill. I’m surprised he didn’t take her up on it. Bill’s not a bad guy. I don’t know why, I’m not gonna say her name, is so mean to him. lol

  51. I might have to check out that recipe. It sounds delish.

  52. and now Mr. Uppity thinks we should do that all the time.

    Mr U must be quite the happy guy now, wondering if the next rapture date is around the corner, for some more fun times.

    nobody I know got Raptured.

    Everyone was too busy yesterday working to pay the bills, to find time to be sucked up into the great beyond. Now they are recovering from a long week from work, enjoying and snickering along with this post.

  53. Vivien, I love MKBill too. Hey, I’m his lawyer. Was just yanking his tail during the Rapture. And, he knows why. (Five unpaid legal bills!)

  54. PMM, if you’re there, I need your help/expertise. A few posts back, you said you freeze your apple pie filling to use later. Well, I got some fabulous Northern Spies today but the farmer said he didn’t think they’d have any by the time Thanksgiving comes around. I’d like to put by some of these, just in case. Can I freeze them raw? If not, what do I need to do to prepare them? Thanks.

  55. Sophie- I put my apple pie filling in the freezer all the time. Put the apples, spices and sugar in- hold the flour til you get ready to bake. Yup- raw- I get really good results with it. I leave out the flour because once it mixes with the sugar and the apples it forms a kind of glue. When you pull the filling out to use it- let it thaw and then add the flour.

  56. socal: …..over in Saudi, and when they were home, they told him a lot of stories. One of them, who is over as part of a building/engineering teaching group says, that no matter how hard he tries to emphasize correct and safe construction, they refuse to learn and keep doing their neanderthal construction practices, stuff that will crumble to the ground in an earthquake and help spread smoke in a fire. He says the compound living is really strange, they keep all the different nationalities separate, and they can’t wear shorts becuz it shows their legs.

    Another guy is there because he is a landscape specialist for growing in sand. He says he is making tons of money…

    How crazy that people who have spent a gazillion years living in sand, need someone from the outside to teach them how to grow in sand. You’d think the Saudis would be expert in it for at least the last couple of thousand years! But maybe it’s related to the constuction story – maybe they just don’t learn new things. Maybe that explains their religion, too….

  57. lorac, your last two sentences sum it up quite well.

  58. lorac, funny how they understand how to bury women in the sand up to their necks but they can’t plant anything else on their own.

  59. NES Bill says your work was promised as pro bono, and now you are sending bills. He says he’s not paying you squat for that paternity and swears he was nowhere near that golddigger.

  60. Crier, Mr U, who is a very good cook, had a moment of insanity during Rapture Day. Somebody told him you could make lasagna in a crockpot.

    I shook my head all day as the concoction festered in the crockpot. Then I was forced to eat crow AND lasagna, because it really did taste very good.

  61. Socal Bill says he will come spend the winter but he refuses to give out his autograph to anybody, famous or otherwise, without compensation.

  62. PMM, {{{Thanks!!!}}}

  63. funny how they understand how to bury women in the sand up to their necks but they can’t plant anything else on their own.

    Can you really grow women that way? 😉

  64. No sophie, but you can make fertilizer out of them after you stone them to death in front of the very entertained crowd.

  65. Doesn’t say much for the crowd if they find that sort of thing entertaining. Makes you wonder why our “leaders” even bother talking to them,

  66. Crockpot lasagna? Is that anything like skillet lasagna? I thought it was something my mom dreamed up, but I’ve found some pretty good recipes for it. Not bad, but not the same as a good baked lasagna.

    NES, you sure were quick to jump in and claim to be she who I did not name. Feeling guilty? I know you love Bill. I can tell. I just prefer to follow the golden rule myself. Coo coo kachu.

  67. Sophie, we talk to them because of Oil.

    Also they own something like 12% of the USA now.

  68. Vivien — Ha! (Okay, maybe a little guilty.)

  69. It’s not the paternity suit you know about, Upps. It’s the matter you don’t know about. (Psssst…MKBill, pay up [I’ll accept comp in nip] or I’ll give her the details.)

  70. Ok Upps, NeedleNose has dropped her demands to two, as follows:

    – blogging privileges at your site; and
    – a monthly dinner invite to your house for NES and her partner (complete with directions to the house).

    Why not just ask her how to get here, NES? She’s a dog. She knows how to come home.

  71. NES, Bill says if you reveal client confidential information, he’s going to report you to the Bar, get your licence pulled and force you to open a sanctuary for black cats, white cats and black and white cats, which will lose money perpetually–especially since he will visit with the females often.

  72. Good idea. I’ll let her out now and follow her to the UW abode. (lorac’ers will be soooo J.)

  73. Hey Bill, just kiddin’ little guy.

  74. Poor Barky — his one and only hope of re-election is at severe risk.

  75. Hey Bill, just kiddin’ little guy.


  76. Ok I’ll get dinner started. What do you guys want to eat?

  77. Socal, I think MKBill might be scared to come to California. I’m sure he reads all of FF’s posts on the EQs!

  78. Say there imust, check your emails. I fished an email from you out of spam over at my yahoo place. Sorry, cause it probably looked like i ignored you.

  79. I see where that intrusive spyware known as Google is working again on taking over everything. They are considering buying yahoo.

  80. we talk to them because of Oil.

    Powerful intoxicant, that oil stuff–that it could make smart, first world leaders who ordinarily would be repulsed by abuse of a female suddenly find that entertaining.

  81. TLC doing a Muslim Reality series. If you care, raise your hands. And I thought they went over the top with propaganda when they did the Polygamy series.
    We’d all be screaming bloody murder if they did a Christian or Jew series.

    Filmed in the Sharia cesspool of Detroit of course. All American my ass. Nothing like watching wormen covered in black walking behind their husbands.

  82. Care to meet the people who trained the left and prepped them for Hillary Bashing 2008. Now you might understand why I despise the far right as much as I despise the far left. Two sides of the same despicable coin. Make sure you read ALL the filthy, sexist stereotypical Hillary comments, reminiscent of 15 years of doing her in before the left even got around to it. And think twice the next time you trust these savages, left OR right.
    Please note and add this shitbag site and their small, threatened dicks to the ban list.

  83. “Care to meet the people who trained the left and prepped them for Hillary Bashing 2008.”

    “HOTAIR” – coming out of nothing but a bunch of a$$e$ with a blowhole cause.

    nuff said.

  84. Except… notice how they appear so righteous over Ghadaffi’s “inhumane treatment” and Sec Clinton’s response to his demise?

    Oh, Boo Hoo for Ghadaffi and Bravo Clinton’s reaction – of a woman who knows first-hand how the “Ghadaffi’s” of the ME treat human beings – especially women.

    Nothing stinks worse than HOTAIR coming from “human rights” hypocrites – foaming out the “mouth” over one of the most dedicated human rights activists in history.

  85. This from their comments:

    I can’t imagine Condi behaving like that.

    Me either. Condi, who “never could have predicted” anything.

  86. Or as the one holdout commenter there said, Condi who handed over the Gaza election to Hamas.

  87. Condi “I think it said…something like…Bin Laden determined to attack the US” Rice.

  88. Well what do you know! We finally had a frost last night. October 23. Has to be the latest first frost. The latest last frost was the year I went out on the 4th of July to find all my basil plants blasted.
    Very very strange weather.

  89. Well haven’t had that yet, but it’s coming. Really, Mom, you would think we Season people would be more depressed. lol.

  90. check mail Mom.

  91. Lol on the not depressed! I just get the feeling we are gonna pay for it!

  92. Uppity- when is your normal first frost? We normally start getting light frosts in Sept- and hard, killing frost around the end of Sept beginning of Oct.
    We went from no frost to a hard killing frost last night. Of course it has been raining and raining and raining- which keeps frost from forming. Also keeps the damn grass growing. And very little fall color- lots of yellows and brown- not much of the reds and orange. Some of the trees are still a sickly shade of green.

  93. Mom we’ve had them as early as October, but rarely before that. We have had big swings in temp though. One day 65, next day 50, stuff like that. I do know it’s going to start snowing early because of all the precipitation we’re getting. That’s not going to stop, it seems. So it will be snow instead of rain. Not that I care. I don’t mind snow much. I like it better than freezing rain and wind. At least when it snows, things seem calm and peaceful. The leaves on our trees have only just barely begun to turn, much less fall. Very odd, because usually by now, they are pretty heavy on the ground.

  94. Looks like our trip to the adirondacks will be later this year. I hear the trees are looking good but not quite at peak yet. It’s breathtaking and I never miss it.

  95. Yes- very very strange fall this year. Here as well the ground is usually covered in leaves by now- I love walking in the fall in a normal year- that smell that is just SO distinctive. We have had wild temp swings here- you remember I was forced to put the storms down and turn on the heat as we had days on end of 40 degrees and raining? The we had a week where it shot back up into the 70’s. Weird.

  96. Uppity Woman, on October 22, 2011 at 12:40 PM said:

    Hey Foxy, I knew you had about as much a chance of being Rapturized as I did. 🙂

    😆 😆

  97. I gotta say say.it has been so long that I forgot.might get raptured and not even know it. 😆

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