What happens when your neighbor’s wierd kid does the Christmas techno lights

Christmas Techno-Lights. Depending on how you feel about them, they are getting better or worse every year. This year, the sounds coming from these seizure-inducing homes promise to break some records. And some eardrums.

Let’s face it. Everybody knows a family like this: They have this freaky son nobody but they can stand to have around. And they are stuck with him. However, if they are your neighbors, you are stuck with him too. Many times during the year you have fantasized about how great it would be if he just got arrested for a few of the rude, shitty things he’s done and all the drugs he’s ingested– and is sent away for a few years. But it never happens. Oh no, it never happens. He’s saving his jail time for something REALLY big in the future.

For now, it doesn’t look like the family is moving any time soon, and, since they are concurrently afraid of him and too lazy to do the Christmas decorating anyways, here is your Christmas treat, served up every evening as soon as the darkness falls, and it will continue for an indeterminate time, or until someone calls these crazy people on the phone and threatens their lives.

This year’s ‘winner’.

5 miles away, a grandfather and grandmother try to figure out  the techno-sh!t they call music, known as Dubstep. If he lived next door to the people above, he would  be able to describe this sh!t even better.


120 Responses

  1. ROF Uppity. I have seen many of these and some are quite nice but I think they belong in a place where folks who want to see that can go to see it. Not in my neighborhood. I have boatloads of lights on my place and always do. I have a theme and light like crazy but display 5 hours only. Lights out at 10.
    No blinkers or flashers !
    We had a house down the road from us 2 years ago that did this and be darned if I could get in or out of my driveway at night because of the looky lous.
    Now I am big on Christmas lighting. I think it is one of my favorite parts of the holiday. I enjoy driving around seeing folks light displays but honestly these do little for me. Every now and then one is cool but after you have seen it eh.

  2. The work it takes is impressive and it certainly takes TECHNO savvy and talent, but this Dude, is way over the neighborhood status

    just showing off I guess, too bad, somtehing that could be so Nice is so annoying

  3. The grandparents have really nice Beatles Collection. The house? Blech.

    off to the doc.

  4. Everybody knows a family like this: They have this freaky son nobody but they can stand to have around.

    I resemble that remark.

  5. Sonuvabitch. The Obama Christmas trip to Hawaii will cost taxpayers $4 million.

    These people disgust me.

  6. Sorry Uppity.

  7. Whatchu sorry bout, Foxy?

  8. FF: good luck at the doc’s hope everything is OK

  9. I was just flipping through the channels and caught the end of an interview with Bill Clinton on NBC morning program. They were talking about giving books as Christmas gifts. They asked for his list of 5 books and both hosts were sooo impressed with his list. One said, “I feel smarter just reading the list”. Oh brother. Especially considering one host posted her list with books by Tina Fey and something about Lady Gaga.

  10. Mrs. Claus has car stolen from a mall so the mall manager bans her from the mall. Public outcry and the mall lets her come back. On the way back to the mall she finds her abandoned car.

  11. Geez- my lowly manger scene with the Holy Family, a star and angel and a few blanket lights placed to look like a night sky, a shepherd, a couple of sheep and a cow is so so-
    No music, no flashing or blinking.
    I am SO behind the times.

  12. Mom I have one that was made by my uncle who died in the war before I was born. There is the barn made of old barn wood as is the manger. And the figurines are all hand painted. I even have the original hay. I don’t use it, as I don’t do the religious statue thing, but it was handed down to me.

  13. My life-sized “manger” scene a few years back: My father’s prized 49′ international PU had a removable iron bed rack with a canvass tarp, which I borrowed for the frame of the structure. I covered the top with hay, of course, and made the side walls with old wood planks.

    Among the animals were porcelain doves and wicker reindeer wrapped in lights. I stuffed a Santa suit, and made his head out of a Styrofoam wig stand, covered it with his hair and a beautiful Santa mask as his face.

    I positioned Santa on bended knee, kneeling over the baby in a wicker basket of hay, with his hands outstretched – presenting his GIFT to the CHILD – His HEART, using a red, heart-shaped helium balloon.

    My Christmas Yard Theme was – “The Greatest Gift Is Love”

  14. WhyNot! Sounds lovely! One of the churches in our area has a tradition- at the end of the family Mass on Christmas Eve, before the final hymn, Santa comes in. He removes his hat and ever so slowly processes down the aisle, where he kneels in prayer before the crib. The he gives a little 2 or 3 minute talk to the children about the Greatest Gift- Love- and how Jesus is the reason for the season.
    I have to say I wept the first time I saw it.

  15. You know, I see where A and E has a storage locker wars reality show, where people bid on the contents of storage lockers people had to abandon for one reason or another. SOme of it is really funny. Until you realize that there’s also a pawn shop show and, really what’s left, a dumpster diving show? A homeless show? These shows are a relection of what America has come to…….while the Obamas go to Hawaii for Christmas at the taxpayers’ cost share of FOUR FREAKING MILLION DOLLARS. These two creatures really ARE Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos!

  16. And here’s another indicator of just how mean and nasty Republicans are when it comes to the middle class. They guard the expiration of the tax cuts for the rich like they are guarding their children, but they think that payroll tax cut that garners like 15 freaking bucks for everybody else shouldn’t continue on because we can’t afford THAT! Nasty! Just nasty creatures!

  17. I hate that storage locker show- I can see the scheming gleam in the other half’s eye.
    As for that tax cut- isn’t that the Social Security gutting move? That’s the ticket- pretend to help us while creating problems for Social Security down the road.
    You are right – they are nasty nasty creatures. God forbid they actually got to damn work and figured out how to fix the damn tax code. But NOOOO- they reduce the revenue going to Social Security as part of their kill social programs plan – call it a tax cut- and then when it is due to expire- call it a tax increase.
    Since the Bush “tax cuts” we have paid more every year. What tax cut? Oh the one where they just changed the withholding tables so we escaped an underpayment penalty by the skin of our teeth and some FAST moving on my part? That is NOT a tax cut- that was a blatant attempt to screw us.

  18. Those kind of x-mas light shows make my brain bleed !! It’s worse than that Steamroller stuff. The grandparents are hilarious in their genuine attempt to understand that music.

    Here is a good response to that vid:

  19. That doozie of a video incites visions of a six pack of beer, a wool blanket and a mother of a grand mal.

    We have a few of these in one neighborhood that try to outdo the other neighbors each year. CNN was here to film of these local nightmares. Whatever happened to The Christmas Song? I like peace.

  20. I see you’ve decorated the place. Nice!

  21. Yes Sophie, but nothing overdone. That would be so UnUppity!

  22. Well there goes myiq, putting up something I had planned again. Maybe I should just give him the keys.

  23. LOL Fembots. Toilet sounds. Hahahaha.

  24. I posted this over at TW and Beata said I really needed to put it here.

    In the Christmas spirit, lovely little kitten needs and deserves a good home for Christmas and you know you want to adopt him. Just don’t turn your back on him.

    Actually Upps, she said you’d have him turned into a lap cat before you know it. His name is *burger and fries*. I somehow think there was one cat named burger and one fries and one night fries disappeared. So Merry Christmas upps, I’m sure it’s exactly what you need.

  25. Off to get some din-din. BBL. Yes this was a hit and run because of the post above. 😆

  26. Beata was right.

    Eh, the cat’s just scared. You would be too. He’s scared witless.

  27. What happens when you have a Christmas tree and cats.

  28. (I’m still here) I just wondered if it had been a feral cat or something. I know the term but have never seen one captured so don’t know how they’d act.

  29. Anybody order a monitor being delivered by Fed Ex?

  30. Fredster, he looks to me like he’s being reactive and doesn’t have much going for him since he is scared and in captivity, at the mercy of those two legged creatures, some of whom at one time or another weren’t very nice to him. When a cat is REALLY scared he will go into fight or flight. He can’t flight. He might or might NOT be a feral, but feral is often used to describe strays if they run from people or do what he’s doing when they are captured.

  31. Thanks for the info upps. I just know he’s *not* a happy camper at that time.

  32. And Kim jong il is still dead.

  33. Who would be, Fredster? You gotta think like a cat. What would I do with him? I’d let him chill for a week and feed him great stuff. I would talk to him. And I would get him out of that public area where the sights and sounds make him think he’s toast. I sure as HELL wouldn’t put a video camera in his face and talk about him like he’s a joke. Idiot.

  34. My dog despises our fed ex guy. Loves our UPS guy. Fed ex guy is so scared of my dog, he leaves packages far from the door. my dog just hates his ass.

  35. Bill’s Tweet. Sigh.

    Moderator Kitteh
    MKBill2 Moderator Kitteh
    Won’t be long before humans gather round the non-denominational shrub & hand out stuff to each other. If we cats don’t tear things up first.

  36. Moderator Kitteh
    MKBill2 Moderator Kitteh
    I once peed in the tree stand. Well, more than once, really.

  37. Fredster, God knows how long that POS was really dead. They probably had his ass in a meat locker for weeks, trying to figure out what to do.

  38. They have his ass under bullet proof glass. Like somebody’s gonna kill him.


    8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing!

    9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!

    9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

    10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

    12:00 pm – Lunch! My favorite thing!

    1:00 pm – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

    3:00 pm – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

    5:00 pm – Milk bones! My favorite thing!

    7:00 pm – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

    8:00 pm – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!

    11:00 pm – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


    Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

    Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a ‘good little hunter’ I am. Bastards!

    There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of ‘allergies.’ I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

    This morning I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow– but at the top of the stairs.

    I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released – and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

    The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now…

  40. That’s funny.

    I saw a cartoon once where a guy walked in the door, the dog started jumping, saying, “he’s home, he’s home.” The bird in the cage, started squawking, “cracker, cracker.” The cat looks up and says, “who’s that”?

    The tree looks good.

    What’s the word on FF? Has anyone heard?

  41. I got my very first automated Hillary 2012 call today…

  42. Allie! Myiq was asking earlier- there was a story somewhere about the Hillary robocalls and who is/is not really behind them! Do tell all! I am heading for bed- but will be sure to check in tomorrow to hear all about it!

  43. Someone is putting the feelers out there. I got an email the other day from Allison Wright. She was the director of compliance for Hillary’s campaign. Did anyone, not you Upps, read the link myiq posted about that?

  44. FF, it’s Tuesday night, you must check in with us! Did the MD give you relief?

  45. Feelers is right vivien. Something is beginning to stir….people are responding and reacting.

  46. Wow, that cat is terrified!!!!! And maybe he’s never spent a day away from his friend, who is now gone – that would make him feel more alone and scared!

    And anyway, Fredster, tell Beata to bring stuff here, herself – it’s time for her to come back!

  47. PMM I’ll bet your neighbors are very appreciative of your beautiful, but not assaulting, Xmas house!

  48. I better plug in my home phone – *I* want a “write in Hillary” robo call, too!!!!!

  49. On Bill O’Reilly he interviewed Bill C tonight. Among the questions, he asked who Bill would be voting for. Bill said Obama (maybe he will, but if he isn’t, he certainly couldn’t announce anything otherwise!)

    After Bill left, Monica Crowley and Alan Colmes were there with Bill O’Reilly, and Monica was pretty forceful that she doesn’t believe that Bill will be voting for Obama hahahahaha

  50. Write in, is that what the robo calls are about?

    Worked in Alaska.

  51. Come on Allie, give it up. Inquiring minds want to know.

  52. Myiq wrote a post on it and John Smart has a new post up right now about it. Oh, and Hillary is 44 also.

  53. I need to get out more.

  54. I’ll reserve judgment on it at this time. I certainly don’t buy into conspiracy theories before an ounce of information is available. And when a blogger I no longer bother reading because of a scathing Hillary attack, says he doesn’t like H44, that’s a definitely write-off for me. Taking shots at other bloggers by name really makes me sick. Unless they obviously are duping people like a certain Buzz blog did.

    The history of this blog speaks for itself. At least I didn’t turn on Hillary, which is more than I can say for…

  55. Let’s wait and see. It’s not like someone is hanging from the neck and a life depends on figuring this out in five minutes.

  56. http://www.blogger. com/comment.g?blogID=6604414&postID=6444698659021903525&page=1&token=1324443273013

    UW, who is this Cannonfire guy? He says that John Smart is a dem site, but that Uppity woman and Hillary is 44 and crawdad hole are republican sites!!!! I told him that since he can allow that John is a dem, maybe he should “check with the man” (John) in order to get facts he’ll feel safe trusting!!! lol don’t know if he’ll publish it. Whoever he is, wow is he out of touch – doesn’t know much about pumas, I guess.

  57. Ah fuck him. i don’t care what he says. And I am pissed if I sent him even an inch of traffic. Who the hell does he think he is judging people. I stopped looking at him when he wrote a post entitled I AM DONE WITH HILLARY and bashed her roundly. Now he’s suddenly worrying about Hillary? Now I don’t want to discuss him any longer. Forget him. Or go there instead of here. Whatever. If he doesn’t feel safe with me, we’re even. At least I don’t crap on Hillary as soon as things don’t go my way. As if he “reviews” matter. Do you remember his ‘analysis’ of Weiner and how he was just being “set up”? He was pretty emphatic too, like he was In The Know. He looked foolish and couldn’t even have the sense to admit it.

  58. I agree Uppity. But there is a lot of chatter right now. It will be interesting to watch it play out.

  59. And STOP giving him links here.

  60. Yup, imust, interesting but anybody who pretends to know for sure right now is full of crap.

  61. I guess one way to troll for traffic is to attack people who never bother you, just like Obots.

  62. Uppity,

    That’s why I don’t go playing on other sites. Must look both ways before crossing the blog street. Could get hit by the blog bus!

    I always read a new blog for a while before commenting, and I never cross post from another blog without checking first. Makes me old fashioned but this is your house your rules.

    Please don’t hit me… 😉

    PS Loved the Dog and Cat Diary. 😀

  63. myiq is a turd stirrer not a Republican. He’s the devil’s advocate day and night. It’s what he does. Look how well he did it here with just one link. I would wring his neck if I weren’t so amused all the time.

    As for me, I hate both of these f*cking parties and am not shy about it either. So that means I don’t pretend to be a Democrat any longer, except I get to vote against crackpots in primaries. Anybody who gives somebody a pass just because they have a D after their name is an idiot, and anybody who is worried whether somebody else is a democrat these days is an even bigger one. All you have to do is read this blog all the way back to know better, unless of course, you are looking for traffic by attacking people.

  64. Well hey goofs, I know exactly what you mean. This is why I don’t comment where I’m not welcome and it makes sense. But there are bloggers out there I disagree with most of the time, that doesn’t mean I have to attack them in public. That would mean I have no class at all, much less credibility, wouldn’t it now? And I don’t run on conspiracies, especially conspiracies by people who already looked like fools with their last ones.

    I can’t think of anything I respect less than a blogger who attacks another blogger with stupidity like calling them a member of a party and other stupid infantile stuff. If I want that kind of shit, I’ll go over to Kos.

  65. UW, I followed a link there – why would I “go there instead of here”???? Especially when I’m saying he’s full of sh*t lol You’re shooting the messenger! I don’t know all these blogs we’re never supposed to link to – maybe next to the “blogs we like”, we can have a list of “blogs never to link to”?

    Forget him. Or go there instead of here. Whatever.

  66. I would wring his neck if I weren’t so amused all the time.

    Yes, he has a way with links, doesn’t he? lol

  67. Wow, that cat is terrified!!!!! And maybe he’s never spent a day away from his friend, who is now gone – that would make him feel more alone and scared!

    EXACTLY. Very dumb shelter.

  68. Good news everyone…

    Only 52 weeks and a day are left before Dec. 21, 2012, when some believe the Maya predicted the end of the world.

    Unlike enthusiasts of other doomsday theories who suggest putting together survival kits, southeastern Mexico, the heart of Maya territory, plans a yearlong celebration.

    The cat diary will continue. The dog diary on the other hand will be “party, party, party.”

  69. Uppity,

    Blog wars, sigh… A sad state of affairs and another way to divide and incite people. It’s because people feel there are no true repercussions, it’s just words.

    Manners are still manners, if I wouldn’t say it to somebodies face, then why is it okay to do on a blog. Oh… right, annonymous.

  70. lorac, I really didn’t mean that specifically for you, I was just venting because i find it unbelievable that a blogger would have such bad taste combined with previously bad judgment.

  71. UW,

    Please extend my apologies to Bill.. I’ve been hogging the computer so Goof hasn’t had a chance to respond. Not that Goof hasn’t tried to get me off the computer…. purring…. head butts… nips… ankle bites… etc… 😉

  72. Blog wars are started by people seeking traffic, goofs. As for me, when somebody tries that, I do what i would do to somebody like that in real life. Treat them like dead people who don’t exist.

  73. Well, even *currently* bad judgement if he thinks we and His44 are republican sites. It’s so black and white, there’s no gray, we’re all for Hillary, she’s a dem, but he still gets it wrong lol

  74. Well it won’t be the first time he got it wrong, so…..Eh!

    So what’s Lorac’s topic tomorrow, considering you get more hits than I do now.

  75. Hey everybody give this link some traffic.

  76. I’m trying to see if a funny artistic creation may be in the works for tomorrow – Xmas theme of course!

    PS I don’t get more hits than you!

  77. last post 225+

  78. UW – shhhhh – it’s because they started talking about FOOD! lol

  79. How is FF? Which reminds me – kisses to Bill under the mistletoe.

    A Happy Lorac eve to all.

    Upps is #1.

  80. If Obama gives away cellphones, they’ll probably be vibrating. “Here Sweetie…have a cellphone.”

  81. I’m worried about FF too! And Happy Lorac Eve to all!!! Yes Virginia…there really is a lorac!

  82. LOL lorac, food is always good for 100 comments.

  83. Upps: Are you still using Firefox? If so, what version? I keep gettng reminded that 8 dot something is available but I’m running 3.6.24. I know they made some big changes and was just wondering about it.

  84. my name is food and I didn’t get 100 comments……whaaaa!!!!

  85. Fredster, stay with the 3.x and don’t leave it! 4 was an absolute freakout and Mozilla tried to make it sound complex to ditch it. However, I pulled it off and never looked back.Also all your addons stopped working in 4 and the screen looked like that horrid Chrome. You can block their reminder using config, but I will have to remember how I did it. I no longer get bugged and am running 3.6.something.

  86. Okay. They have the help thing on how to do the config dealie. I really hate to say it but I haven’t found a browser really worth a shit at all. I thought about trying Opera or Safari but just wasn’t sure.

  87. wow the news just showed 10,000 women marching through the streets of Egypt demanding that the military stop abusing them – geez I hope they survive….

    and in other news, Biden said today that the Taliban isn’t our enemy. Greta brought up the whole list of problems they cause for women, which she saw firsthand when she went there with Hillary…

  88. lorac,

    Biden was right when he said the Taliban isn’t our enemy. He was referring to the males, he’s not talking about how they ruin women’s lives.

  89. I’ve reported the C-website to the authorities, Upps.

  90. Uuuuuutaaaah woman. I’m so impressed by your poetical and lyrical talents. I died laughing! I totally loved all your offerings the other day. Heck, if I weren’t signed up to eat crow already, I’d sign up to eat some in exchange for a verse from your ACD-kissin’ lips.

  91. Awwwww….

  92. Oh, dear. It’s lorac Eve, and I’m in trouble. For the third time, I can’t get my two youtubes to appear on my post – it’s not giving me the usual screen that lets me insert them. The youtube website urls are listed on my draft. If any moderators are around, can you see if you can fix it? They should appear directly on the post as the youtube box, it shouldn’t be the url I have listed there. I didn’t schedule it for the morning yet, because I can’t make it behave! Heeellllppppp!~

    I’ll check in when I wake up, but that will be 9 am New York time….

  93. Uppity, loved the Dog & Cat diaries. The Christmas lights extravaganza not so much. (I think this one was worse than last years) If my neighbors did that, I would have to stop them. My neighbors put up a ton of stuff, which goes in front of our house too, but it doesn’t do that annoying crap. In front of our place they put penguins (I swear to God) & a cute little reindeer and a tree. Laker noticed that the grandparents had good taste in music. Meanwhile, I am sick as a dog. Hubs took me to Dr today & she put me on antibiotics & gave me codeine cough syrup, which I promptly took & now have a raging headache. I cannot handle drugs. I don’t know how people get addicted to opiates, they make me feel awful. NES, agree the c website is annoying.

  94. Looking forward to lorac Weds!

  95. Thanks, socal – if I can get it to work!!!! 😦

    Usually a certain box pops up for me to insert youtubes – but this is the third time it doesn’t work that way, and I can’t figure out what to do! I even restarted my computer and that didn’t help…

  96. NES – who is the little boy in the “awwww” link?

  97. Thats weird about the youtube drops for posts. I have no trouble getting them in my comments, just drag the address into the comment box & the video pops right up.

  98. Omg. What the hell is up his azz now? I thought he was weird before. Well, anyway, thanks myiq. Why should we care what he thinks?

  99. I threw my 2 cents over there at crawdad.

  100. FF, we’re still awaiting your MD report! We want to know you’re on the road to recovery!

  101. I gave crawdad TEN cents.

  102. myiq, if they could give out an award for turd stirring, you would win it.

  103. I’ve reported the C-website to the authorities, Upps

    Why? For being a traffic-begging idiot?

  104. myiq, if they could give out an award for turd stirring, you would win it.

    I don’t stir them, I lob them towards the airflow device.

  105. Thanks so much, UW – I spent so much time, even restarting my computer – just couldn’t get the proper box to open. Frustrating!

    So thanksssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!! 🙂

  106. lorac, sometimes wp does that. Makes you crazy. You can put links in manually though, with the brackets. I’ve actually had to do that myself now and then.

  107. WP has been acting weird lately.

  108. Lorac, that little boy in the Awww picture is our next POTUS, Willard Mittens Romney.

  109. NES, Romney was a kid once?

  110. And a cute-looking kid too.

  111. Uppity Woman – you are hilarious! I loved the video when gramps started trying to ‘dance’ at the end and held out his hands to grandma to join in..(grandma was not taking any part of that)..and like your Dog/Cat diaries above..whew – you get a lot of comments!!

  112. Yeah gramps dancing is what got to me too! I was cracking up!

    Whitelady, I wanted to tell you that I read your work after you posted the other day. You are an EXCELLENT writer.

  113. Whatchu sorry bout, Foxy?
    that you have to put up with that mess.

  114. Thank You soo much! That was kind of you to say.

Comments are closed.