Doesn’t it just figure, considering the religious hacks in this country could screw up a free lunch, and furthermore, never have time to enjoy the beauty that is Life because they are busy with their yearly moronic Doom and Gloom bullcrap.
Seriously, I just wish they would all go rapture themselves and leave the rest of us the Hell alone. But make no mistake: These are the same people you would see running and hiding, shivering in their makeshift bunkers with their canned beef heart, urine purification systems, dried meals, and mystery meat Jerky — if it looked like anything was actually going to happen. Because that would be the time these hypocrites all realized that they Can’t Fool God by praying one way and living another way on the sly.
The photo above is of a typical 2012 Mayan Ritual. This particular ceremony occurred in Cuba. I am not sure WTF the umbrellas signify, but there you have it. I somehow suspect a lot of rum is involved with these ceremonies but hey, what do I know? I live in reality.
This is the big day, folks. Just like all the other Big Days.
This is the big day for which people have spent billions preparing, because they believe the predictions of a culture that wasn’t even capable of predicting its own demise. Just saying. Let’s just say that their calendar ran out a long time ago. However, a good time was had by all the online survivalist vendors, and I am sure plenty of bizarro equipment was purchased at Market Prices.
This is the big day when all religious crackpots fuck up their children and tell them Christmas is canceled because it’s the End Of The World. Ten years from now, the taxpayers will be paying for their kids’ mental therapy program. But for now, they will be eating MREs for a long time to come–so that the bunker provisions can be rotated with fresher dried meals for next year’s End Of World.
The important thing to remember today is not that you will be incinerated along with the rest of Earth. No that is not the important thing to remember. The real important thing to remember is– if you see a bunch of yahoos doing what is being done in the above photo, run like your hair is on fire, for you are truly in the company of some of America’s Most Crazy.
It will be good to know where people who do these things are though, so they can be avoided like plague in the future.
Personally, I am getting sick of this shit every year and I just think we ought to round up all these End-Of-Lifer and Rapture people and examine their grey matter before allowing them to walk among us any longer. I don’t care what anybody else says, I say these people are batshit crazy.
Even the Pope says this is all baloney and if he says so, it must be so, since God is so busy He speaks through a guy in a dress who lives in extreme opulence and wears gold in his crown, surrounding himself with overly-fed guys with perfect manicures who wear red beanies and expect no one to laugh. How can he be wrong? How could anyone possibly mistake him of anything other than God’s Spokesman? Besides, if the Pope bought this story, he would just modify it to include women only.
Let us know in comments what you are doing in your last moments. And be sure to check in frequently today, so we know where you are when you are incinerated or swallowed up or whatever the hell is supposed to happen to you.
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