In the city that never sleeps, EVERYBODY is resourceful

I keep trying to force myself not to post this for everyone beyond a comment section to see, but I just can’t help myself. The more I look at it, the funnier it gets.

This is just plain hilarious. And very resourceful.

Only in New York: I don’t know who’s funnier, the rodent with the pizza or the people cheering him on. I wonder if he’s got a little rat-sized TV in there and a little rat-couch. And if he wears a little ripped rat-tee shirt when he watches little rat reality shows.


94 Responses

  1. Haha! Ah, that is a New York moment!

  2. Gotta give the rat credit: he wanted that slice and he got it to his little home place. The only thing I’ve seen faster (and even more resourceful ) is the way our politicians can scoop up those illegal contributions from corporations and launder them into $25 donations from little old ladies.

  3. Hey socal, I sent u a joke in an email.

  4. So what happened to the rat and slice? My screen was black and showed no images after the rat went under something – no hole was seen ever.

  5. Glad to see this video again; it definitely has staying power!
    Found myself emailing it around yesterday even tho I had to hunt for the link. A cousin responded with admiration for the rat’s determination and hoped it got to eat the whole piece. Another recipient thought video indicated that NYC subway system was considering selling pizzas.

    Perhaps the major key to this vid’s success is that the rat blends well with the darkness. Think if I had a clear view of it my reaction would have been eeeewwwwwww.

  6. Twandx, the concrete is full of holes and there is a whole other city with multiple levels and rooms of all sizes under NY. He took it to his nest and had the slice with a little vino a bum left in a bag nearby.

  7. Look again. I saw his den hole. Very end. Slightly left of center. I’m sure he had to break up that pizza if he was going to fit it in there.

  8. I bet he’s got a little rat-sized TV in there and a little rat-couch. And he wears a little rat-tee shirt when he watches little rat reality shows.

  9. And today’s winning search phrase in the blog stats is

    too upitdy

  10. Me no like NY subway rats.

  11. Here is a juvenile red tailed hawk making a lunch of a rat in Flushing, Queens, my old ‘hood. Moon roofs make great plates, donchathink?

    beata, you might want to skip this vid. It is lunch time for a raptor.

  12. I.DON’T.DO.RATS. – even IF there’s a slice of NY Pizza in the scene.

    …HATE RATS more than you HATE SNAKES, Uppity.

  13. dang, grl, you be the up-it-dy-ist on the net, your definition is right there in the wikipedia and google dick-ton-ery.

  14. Why Not, snakes and rats go together at meal times a well. Mealtime.

    My daughter’s friends had rats as pets and they were creepy at first but the little buggers can be adorable and sweet and win your heart after you get to know them.

    Beata and Why Not: stay out of cities. I saw rats daily in NYC, especially when I lived near the beaches. In Florida too there are loads of rats on the rocks near beaches and rivers. Water, garbage, shelter= rats nests.

  15. …even IF there’s a Flushing Queens red tailed hawk, tearing it apart and having it for lunch, in the scene.

    Uppity… at dusk the other night, I watched a possum, the size of a wart hog, walking the fence and nearly falling off into MY yard a dozen times – biggest possum I’ve ever seen in my life.

    A Possum is a Frankenstein Rat. Seriously, they BOTH give me nightmares.

  16. Why I love NY reason 1 million. Here is how one neighborhood treated an 80 year old couple. Did they say “they are too old, let them go to a shelter” – hell no. WONDERFUL people in Queens. REBUILD.–abc-news-topstories.html

  17. Yeah Karen, if you want to see WILLARD in 3-D – just go to our downtown City Hall park and sit in the parking lot with your headlights on. Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezus!

  18. Great, rats and roaches will survive a nuke blast,plagues, and famine. I guess US senators and congressmen do have “caddy” health care!

  19. You ain’t live until you’ve seen a florida canal rat, let me tell you. I have a horrific story about how, when my parents came up north for the summer and the waterway level got low……and the rats took up residence in thier home because it was unoccupied and not too cool in there. I’m not talking a couple of rats here. I’m talking rats. rats in the ceiling, rats taking all the bed linens and towels and making nests, rats rats rats.

    As for possums, ask Utah about the first time a possum started pestering me. I had no idea WTF it was and thought it was a mutant rat with red eyes. At first I thought it was a large cat on the deck till it turned it’s head. I was freaking over this thing and couldn’t get rid of it. As it turns out my neighbor shot it. But then there was his/her spouse to deal with. And one night, i strolled out the back door late with Needlenose and had no idea it was there till my dog grabbed it and snapped its neck. Disgusting creepy creature.

    I hate rats and possums but nothing says Uppity Get The Gun like a snake. Gratefully no self respecting snake lives around here voluntarily. Except in the adirondaks, much as I love it up there.

  20. I am surprised the hawk is not being charged with a hate crime. The NY gubbner is working on a plan to ban all falcon beaks and talons!

  21. Karen – that’s a great story! Bravo “Operation Blessing” and the people of Queens!!!!

  22. Possums are easy to handle. Just beat em’ a bit with a broom stick, when they play possum, grab em’ by the tail and drop them into a gunny sack. Drag and drop them in the woods, or cook up a mad batch of possum stew. 🙂

  23. Yeah Hillbilly you forgot to add to avoid their FIFTY teeth.

  24. My scheevy filthy ducky that goes Quack Quack Quack over and over and over again with just one bite, or my plastic bottle that goes Crackle Crackle Crackle in your ears. Which should I use while she’s on the phone?

    Decisions Decisions Decisions.

  25. LOL! I remember you and Utah’s possum story from a few months back and laughing til I cried reading it – cause it was YOU!

    Thought you might want to know, the wretched creature has reincarnated itself – into a wart hog-sized monster (not kidding) and is living ‘somewhere-out-there’ now…. HERE!

  26. LOL!

    Well, get off the damned phone, Uppity!

  27. Needlenose is one of those that momentarily takes your breath – a stunning beauty.

  28. My city never had a wildlife problem until a badly thought out recycling program was set into place and people were forced to follow instructions of an authority, and authoritys in NY State are the worst nazis ever, even if they are wrong, they will fine you fornot toeing their line. Generally they are made of of moronic appointees who are relatives and friends of somebody.

    So …………..several hundred thousand people in a county had to put recyclable cans and bottles in specific open bins. They would not pick them up if you didn’t do it their way. And to make it even better, in order to “Encourage” recycling, they made us put our trash in special bags we had to pay for in addition to taxes. This, they reasoned, would make people recycle. What they didn’t reason was that poor people, when given the choice between eating and buying a garbage bag, might just throw their garbage wherever they can in the dark of night. On your lawn even. Or behind their apartment house. Being an authority, admitting they were creating a health hazard took YEARS. During that time, the racoons, possums, skunks and even hungry deer and bear moved in. They corrected their fucking abject stupidity too late of course. The deed is done, and the diseases they carry remind us daily of what fucking assholes NY Authorities really are.

  29. Well, I have to go. RatsUgggg.

    Have a great day, everyone!

  30. cause it was YOU!

    Harumph! I can’t help it if my idea of roughing it is no room service!

  31. Wow. What a travesty. Our “leaders” are all so predictable. Spend trillions screwing it all – to the point it’s too expensive to fix – blame the peasants. Huh?

  32. That video isn’t long enough Hillbilly. They cut out the part about two hours later when the cat bit its neck and dragged it under the porch.

  33. Needlenose is one of those that momentarily takes your breath – a stunning beauty.

    Don’t think for ten seconds she doesn’t know it every minute of the day. She takes the room wherever she goes and if she could write, she would expect to be asked for autographs. It’s pretty damned demoralizing when you walk your dog and everybody looks at the dog instead of you.

  34. Ha! Yeah, that poor possum was just doing what possums do…. scaring the hell out of people!!!

  35. That nice kitty would not do that UW. Reminds me of Slyvester and Twitty, when Granny is looking, Sly pets and kisses Twitty, when she turns her back: Down the hatch:)

  36. I can understand why. Seriously, she’s stunning to look at – one of those “privileges” to get to see an animal like that.

  37. Heh don’t kid yourself Hillbilly. I watched three visiting cats have a meeting over that frigging woodchuck I had on my land last spring. And the rooster that showed up on my land nearly lost it’s neck to them instead of the guy who came and bagged it for his dinner table. I know cats, Hillbilly and NEVER assume they aren’t going to go into instinct mode one day. This is always a mistake. Cats retain far more of the Wild than dogs do. I see it every day.

  38. Ok, gotta go DO so-called, ‘important’ STUFF. lol.


  39. Too bad you don’t have a good sized dog, Why Not. Possum would be history in a big hurry.

  40. So instinct mode is the reason my cat Tink goes postal on my toes, even though I am asleep and my feet are covered?

  41. Why Not, Utah had the distinct pleasure of a ducky serenade on the phone. I’m not kidding. She does this to me. That, or she pretends Joe is killing her and whines, honks, clacks, barks and simpers as loudly as possible, while Joe lies there upside down pawing her with a WTF look on his face. And if you have ever heard a collie make collie noises, you would know that a phone call will soon come to an end.

  42. Good read on Texas and its attack on wimmenz health. Way to go Perry – you dimwitfuck wimmenz hater club member.

    Love the comments section. Somebody says the women of Texas should join with the women of India to fight for rights – that is truly a good idea of just how bad things are and that it is truly a war on us!

  43. Why Not, in spite of her annoying beauty, she has a wonderful heart and soul and very very benevolent to all. Unless you’re breaking in or she perceives a threat. Then she scares even me. But damn if she isn’t always right.

  44. When my parrot is here and he wants me to hang up the phone, I have to lock him or myself in a room, even the bathroom works if need be or I would end up being ruled by him. And when you do hang up he often can be heard doing his AHA-ha-ha-ha snickering decending laugh.

    They are out to get us. They’re lucky the cute factor saves them.

  45. You’ll be back. we’re habit forming.

  46. Those parrots are damned smart. I don’t think I could handle one. I think I told the story of Caw Caw, the african grey my grandfather inherited. Jesus, that bird was smart and he knew every Italian swear word that ever existed. I remember him calling my mother a putana or something and she looked at him and said, You better pray the old man doesn’t die before you do.

  47. To make matters worse, after seeing Perry in action, it is easy to deduce that he’s a moron. I mean a real moron, not in the figurative sense.

  48. cute – 14 things that look like Lew’s loopy signature:

    also, if you go to Huffington Post, and you click on their politics page, there is an enormous headline about HRC winning 2016 with ease. It made me angry! They attacked her hourly with venom in 08 and now they are touting her as the gold standard that she is. I hate huffy-poop.

  49. Yeah Karen and when 2015 rolls around, they will be the first to post shitty pics of her and skewer her every move.

  50. Grrrr 17 inches of snow thus far in 8 hours and coming down by the tons. Shoveled this shit three times and piss on it. Got to slam the truck in 4wd and just climb out over the damn burm the plow made and make my way to work on roads that can not keep plowed. WTF was I thinking ?

  51. LOL everybody, Utah IS the Diary of The Snow Shoveler today.

  52. Stopping by to say Hi. And praying for Utah also
    Karen – that’s a great story 🙂

  53. That rebuild story. What a beautiful thing.

  54. Hillbilly re: Cockroaches. Something for you.

  55. I think the red-tailed ate the rat that ate the pizza. He was in the mood for Italian, obviously.

    Utah, God Almighty. I would curl up and cry in the fetal position till it melted. I can’t take anymore. It is white outside here too right now but the next few days will be in the 50s so it will be gone, hopefully. Right now it is slippery and dangerously icy. Hope your Kahlua enjoys it!

  56. Yeah I’m counting on those snow banks melting, Karen. So we can get right down to the mud and trash they didn’t pick up that’s been sitting under it all. ALways a treat!

  57. Thanks UW. Brought a tear to my eye. My dad owned a pest control company when he was alive. Some of the places I sprayed…oh, the stories, the joy:)

  58. Oh I can imagine, Hillbilly! Seriously.

  59. 150,000 huge pythons are taking over Florida. Wildlife authorities are no longer in the touchy feely mode and are asking for help killing them. Including a $1500 reward for one of these freaks dead. These burmese pythons aren’t those cute little bouncing baby snakes they were before the assholes released their ancestors. These are predators and they have left the everglades, and moved to people’s yards, grass amd parks. PETA is all in a flutter saying that they are going to be inhumane to these snakes that can suffocate and swallow your child or your pet. PETA needs to be rounded up with straight jackets. I say throw PETA in there and let THEM catch these 200-300 pound sweetie pies. At this point, nobody cares how anybody kills them as long as they are dead. And I don’t blame them one bit. VIDEO HERE.

    Pee Ess: PETA Says if someone cuts a snake’s head off it can suffer for hours. You know what can suffer? A child can suffer when one of these scheevy monsters crushes that child and then swallows it whole, you assholes. If I were in florida and saw one of these things, I would empty my clip into it in a heartbeat. When one of these bastards is resting comfortably in your kitchen, you’re gonna wish you had that gun you don’t want too, let me tell you. NOt to mention that big ole shedded skin in the basement, because that means he’s in your house and feeling fresh and frisky.

  60. UW, there is a beer bash breaking out at my barn, slap on yur best rags and boots and head on over:)

  61. Winning tweet of the day, maybe even the week.

  62. Now whoda thunk the little girl in this TV pilot would become such an accomplished star?

  63. Happy Friday, Uppityites! What a week…sure glad it’s the weekend.

    Who’da thunk we’d have to wait all these years to find out Sister Bertrille’s secret to flying–she has very low bone density, as evidenced by the Boniva commercials.

  64. Bahahaha Boniva.

    Hey at least she’s not all over those social security posters like Patty Duke!

  65. Hey, I adored Patty Duke. Totally.

  66. Hey I think she was a great actress, a little screwed up, but a REALLY good actor. Never said I didn’t like her, just hate seeeing her on those posters looking haggard.
    Especially after she enjoyed the minuet, the ballet and crepes and loves to rock and roll a hot dog made her lose control,,,

    She was GREAT in miracle worker.

  67. You know I’d do this.

  68. My cousin has looked EXACTLY like her at every stage of her life, until now. My cousin is in way better shape now. But no kidding a spitting image.

  69. Sorry about the Greta link. Turns out it’s a special on Haiti, not a current interview.

  70. Leave it Drunk Joe Biden. File under “you can’t make this stuff up”.

    Vice President Joe Biden said on Friday he was “shooting for Tuesday” to get President Barack Obama his recommendations on how to battle an epidemic of gun violence and warned “there’s no silver bullet” to stop the killing.

  71. We forgive ya, imust, annaconta we lovez youse.

  72. Apparently she adored bancroft for life.

  73. OMG!! That numbscull actually SAID “Silver Bullet”????????????????????????

  74. My cousin has looked EXACTLY like her at every stage of her life

    Is your cousin’s name Cathy Lane?

  75. LOL Sophie. Thank goodness it wasn’t because she had to listen to it all her life.

  76. Thanks for the show intro. The only one I like better than that is this one:

  77. Very cool show.

  78. Every episode is on Hulu!

    (except the pilot with Sally Kellerman, the original Cagney and the original Hotlips)

  79. Oh, this is cute!

  80. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. How cute!

  81. Dear Daddy, keep hurting my feelings so you can get a video of me crying, so I can grow up and remember and rip your throat out.

  82. Oh God. That is really sad. I couldn’t watch more than a minute. That dog needs to be rescued from that owner.

  83. The mixed messages alone are enough to tell me this poor dog is going to become a problem thanks to a moron. Huskies are howlers, but this is past that. Just abject stupidity.

  84. File under AYFKM, Cesar? You got your show and one day we will read about who this dog killed.

  85. They better never take that muzzle off that dog and feed him thru a straw. He’s going to kill somebody the minute somebody moves wrong. This is some crazy shit. You don’t know fear till you see one of these Effing dogs coming at you. I still remember. I will NEVER forget.

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