The Kase of the Kindergarten Kerfuffle

A wealthy socialite couple mistakenly buys kindergarten finger painting during a silent auction at their children’s school for $50,0000, and they’re really not happy about it!

Wait that kid looks too happy! I said…THEY’RE REALLY NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT!!!

That’s better!

So apparently the parents really wanted the “masterpiece”. Their son, Hudson’s class painted it. So, in their absence, they instructed the school to make sure they got the painting, (of course, and they should get everything they want!!!!) but they believed that the maximum bid would be $3,000. Much to their dismay, the school allegedly had a teacher bid against the family and drove the price up!! Naturally, a lawsuit was filed against the school. THESE POOR PEOPLE…UM…I MEAN REALLY RICH PEOPLE…. WERE DAMAGED AND SOMEBODY MUST PAY!!!! OH THE HUMANITY!!!!!!

The Heinemanns are so appalled by the school’s behavior that they pulled Hudson out and are now demanding compensation for all of the attending costs — including $20,000 tuition to a new school, forfeited class fees for his little sister, and Hudson’s $60,000-a-year chauffeur, whose job they want to save.

[Sniff-sniff] Of course, of course the chauffeur….they can’t lose the chauffeur! They might have to [gasp] drive their children to school themselves!!!!
But there’s more to this heart wrenching story. I know, you can hardly hold yourself together already…but yes…there’s more…..

Little Hudson Cornelius was already an unhappy kindergartner before this incident, according to a lawsuit filed recently in Manhattan Supreme Court.

The tousled-haired tyke was “underappreciated” there.

“Plaintiff’s son was consistently left out of school exhibits and films . . . and was made to go last at nearly everything,” the lawsuit states.

“On one occasion, plaintiffs’ 5-year-old son was relegated to the role of ‘door-holder’ and ordered to hold the door for all of the other students.”

O.M.G.!!! What kind of “school” is this??? That family forked out their hard-inherited, money for special treatment for their special offspring Hudson.

I really can’t say anymore about this, I’m too broken up. I’ll close with a list of their pain, suffering and damages. Keep kleenex box handy if you plan to read any further…

They say they “were forced to endure humiliation and emotional damages” as a result of the auction debacle. They’re seeking $415,900 in damages, including the following:

a. Tuition to a new school- $20,000;
b. Forfeiting deposit paid to Defendant School for the following school year- $5,000;
c. Maintaining the employment of a family driver that is no longer needed due to the relocation- $60,000;
d. Continuing the employment of the family housekeeper that is no longer needed due to the relocation- $1,200 per week

I can’t imagine what they’re going through…..I mean I really can’t imagine…

It’s not easy being rich!


16 Responses

  1. God, that’s hilarious! “Underappreciated”!!! ROFL!

  2. They really are blood suckers.
    Jon is an investment banker

  3. ROFL! Yes Sophie, that’s the family!

  4. Really blood suckers–he’s an investment banker. He’s also husband #4. Husband #3 was a Norwegian Financier, whom she claimed was a sex addict.

  5. Ewww. Speaking of revolting people that want everyone else to do things their way:

    I was clicking around the channels (we just switched providers and there are all new channels) and I stopped at bsnbc becuz there was a clip called “Men At Work” on, all pictures of all all these different states trying to restrict or end abortion. It was so funny, all pix of 6 or 7 old white men smiling while one of them signs an anti abortion bill. Not a woman in sight. What a bunch of nasty old creeps. Ohio just supposedly signed the harshest bill yet and the gov. (kasich?) had some little preschooler dot the “i” on the bill or something, and all the dirty old white men around this little kid were clapping. Really sick, like they’re training the next generation of vagina nazis.

  6. Socal, I saw that too. Ohio, North Carolina, Texas: No place for women!

  7. ICYMI, here’s the new law in Ohio, packed into the budget where they never got debated and cannot be recalled, that Kasich signed with all of his boyz.

    – strip Planned Parenthood of roughly $1.4 million in federal family-planning dollars
    – requires abortion clinics to obtain a “transfer agreement” with a hospital before performing abortions but restricts the clinics from signing such agreements with public hospitals—meaning that in the midst of a medical crisis an abortion clinic patient will no longer be allowed to transfer to a public hospital and will have to find a private hospital alternative.
    – requires doctors to perform trans-abdominal ultrasounds prior to an abortion
    redefines a fetus as “developing from the moment of conception,” rather than when a fertilized egg has been implanted in the uterus.
    – rape crisis clinics are prohibited from counseling sexual assault victims about abortion. If they do so, they will lose their public funding

  8. Wow, they really are cutting away at the foundation of the right to abortions. It’s very clever if you think about it, or despicable is probably a better word. They’ll make it more and more difficult for someone, especially someone of modest means to access the process, that it becomes the same as just flat out making it illegal. Boil the frog slowly. That’s how they’re tearing away the social safety net as well. Starve the beast ($$). Then claim to “save” programs through cuts and austerity and privatization. It’s Orwellian in it’s manipulation. Sorry….what did I just say? Rambling, probably should go to bed!

  9. If these rich idiots had any character, and a sense of humor, they could have turned this into a funny story and good pr for them. Silent auctions are usually for charity, so maybe they could have used it as a charitable deduction. (Not sure about that, never having bought expensive art, have sold some, but never bought it…but if Romney can deduct 80 grand for half of the living expenses for a show horse…).

    Or they could have just had a sit down with the school and told them that they thought the auction went out of control and given them a check for five grand, or whatever, and been done with it. Its really pretty funny, someone jacking up the price, but I doubt if the school would have held them to it. The funniest part of the whole thing though is the ridiculous law suit claims. Hubbie & Laker shouted with laughter (they both have big deep voices, almost blew my eardrums out, its amazing I have any hearing left between my loud family and all the concerts we go to.

  10. imust @ 1:23, yes, exactly.

  11. Good point socal. Maybe they were pains and the school wanted to get rid of them!!

    On that topic. Sophie had some interesting tidbits about them up thread. Then I came across this interesting piece from last year about “Manhattanites” preparing for Hurricane Sandy. Here’s what HRH Mrs. Heinemann said to the New York Observer:

    Indeed, Manhattanites seem to prefer sitting out Sandy in apartments, townhouses and hotels. Even those passed the better part of the weekend at their country homes battening hatches and moving lawn furniture opted to drive back to the city before the hurricane struck.

    “I just spent all day in the country. We were trying to decide, do we stay in the country or come back to the city. But in the country we were afraid we’d lose power, that there would be trees falling,” said painter and Upper East Side social fixture Michelle Marie Heinemann, who left her Connecticut country home in the care of the two live-in caretakers before motoring back to the Upper East Side.

    Ms. Heinemann told us that she been rushing around for the last two days, laying in extra cell phone batteries, food, candles, formula for the baby, buying games and coloring books to keep the children occupied, and gassing up the couple’s four cars in case of emergency. She had also asked her laundress to come in yesterday to do all the washing. “I thought if she couldn’t come in I’d be stuck,” Ms. Heinemann said.

    “I do feel safer here than in the country. The country is beautiful and we have a generator, but you never know and it’s a big house,” she said. “I’m totally prepared. I bought a ton of coffee and I have a lot of champagne here, so I know I’m stocked up.

  12. OMG! These people are unreal! That sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit.

  13. Good grief, what is wrong with these people! Tasteless, mental midgets. Shows they don’t have real friends, who’d have to slap them silly for this grotesquerie.

  14. Hudson will grow up to be Draco Malfoy.

  15. Ha! And he kinda looks like him too! (See Sophie’s photo at 10:50pm)

  16. Screech–new post up!

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