The GOP Clown Car is taking their show on the road!
In case you’re just tuning in, there are A LOT of Republican candidates–too many to have an effective debate (17). So Fox, the host of the first debate, said they would take the top 10 in national polls and let them debate each other (the Serious Debate™) and the remainder would be be relegated to the Kid’s Table Debate. Fox kept their poll sources a secret all this time, but now we finally know: “Fox News’ Decision Desk said the five polls included in Fox’s average were conducted by Bloomberg, CBS News, Fox News, Monmouth University and Quinnipiac University.”
Iowa and New Hampshire haven’t been happy about this turn of events because, after all, it’s their role to decide who makes the cut and who doesn’t. I guess the RNC Rules and Bylaws committee has a weird set of roolz too.
The Serious Debate begins at Thursday, August 5, 2015 at 8:50 PM, east coast time and shall include: Donald Trump, Jeb Bush, Scott Walker, Mike Huckabee, Ben Carson, Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, Rand Paul, Chris Christie and John Kasich.
This runs until 11 PM, at which point, it will be just in time to tune in to the last edition of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (#JonVoyage). The star-studded Grand Finale will be 52 minutes long. Don’t ask me why 52 minutes. (He will have to come up with something superb to beat Colbert’s Finale. Not that was really grand.)
The Kiddie Hour is from 5-6 PM, where the remaining guys will attempt to make the case that they belonged in the Serious Debate, if only Trump didn’t swoop in and take their place at the podium: Rick Perry, Rick Santorum, Bobby Jindal, Carly Fiorina, Lindsey Graham, George Pataki, and Jim Gilmore. (Who the heck is Jim Gilmore?)
So, join in for the live blogging fun—Mystery Science Theater 3000 style.